MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND 2009.

Hey, I guess I'm not that poor because I have been going to concerts here and there once in a while and now I've scored No Doubt tickets for one of their shows here in late July! WOOHOO!

So my young co-worker/bud is like really majorly pissed at me this week, because he says I keep putting him down making him look like a dumbass when I tell him to "shut up" in passing conversation, but I totally think this young man is taking it way out of proportion for he says some mighty insulting things at times too, and I certainly don't take them personally; I am used to hanging with people who talk royal smack left and right, people who can take a good joke and crap, but whatever, now I've offended him and I feel bad and shit, and yet I scold/advise this friend at work all the time for not getting laid (he's good-looking too), for being very solitary, for not exposing himself to the little joys of life, and for generally being an energy vampire. Know what that is?! An energy vampire is one of those people we all have in our lives who always feel victimized, who are always bitter/angry, who never solve their problems, blame others,and leave ya feeling depressed, exhausted, and guilty! THEY BITCH AND COMPLAIN AND MOAN AND DON'T DO ANYTHING TO LIGHTEN UP OR BETTER THEIR SITUATION! UGH! I know life sucks and makes me want to hang myself at times, but JESUS CHRIST, ¡SANTO DIOS DE LA INMACULADA CONCEPCIÓN! Heed my advice ye negative sensitive woe-is-me good people: find what makes ya happy! A flower, a picture, a TV show, a good lay, an iPod, a concert, a movie, a book, a good friend, etc. Enhance yer life with something! This is frankly as good as it gets. I wish I could offer you more, but this IS IT. I'm one big giant twisted dark bastard at times, but I at least can find some JOY IN LIVING!

Ever heard of this porn star from Spain named Nacho Vidal? WHOA! MA GOODNESS SUNSHINE! This dude is kind of hot actually, and has a huge, A HUGE SCHWANZ! If you are easily offended, or at work, do not, DO NOT go to this or to this link, but he truly is one aggressive heterosexual! And these women seem to really be enjoying him in some of those clips! LOLOL! I think Nacho has retired now, since he got married at all, and got accused at times of maybe being bisexual, but Nacho says that he is strictly hetero but very open-minded and aware of his legions of gay male fans; fittingly enough, Nacho also directs gay and transgender porn! And how in tha hell, does a silly band like Caninus even exist?! AHAHAHAHAH! Thanks to one of the idiots who works for Howard Stern, I have learned about this hardcore death metal band with two barking pitbull dogs as the lead singers! CANINUS! Here's a sample of their amazingly hilarious work!

It's Memorial Day weekend! YEEHA! I'm going to enjoy it, have fun, and forget all my problems! That's right dawg, and you betta do tha same! I leave ya with this incredibly stupid but FUNNY spoof: