HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND 2012.

There was an annular solar eclipse this past Sunday right?  NOW 2012 WILL TRULY TAKE OFF! MOOHOOHAHAHHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...

I went to the free public health clinic with my friend last week to get all our complete thorough STD testing done.  Everything looks good so far, although the HIV test is always a bit nerve-racking, regardless of how careful I've been.  I've done this so many times now I've lost count, but as a responsible adult, one has to keep up with this at least once a year.  Lord knows I'm no longer the promiscuous pig of yesteryear, but ya never know, so it's best to get tested to make sure I don't have any bugs in my blood.  

It's amazing how time flies man!  And while I usually like what I see in the mirror these days, I am conscious of the fact I am getting older.  To be pushing my forties thirties here is worrying me just a bit.  Not because of the number, but I want to be able to hold on to my facade as long as possible!  LOLOLOL!  GOOD LAWD MAN!  I see all these celebs and their incredible amount of fame and wealth, and yet none of them can stop the hands of time, regardless of how many cosmetic procedures they pay for.  AND THEY STILL CAN'T STOP DEATH!  Steve Jobs was worth billions and cancer ate him up last year!  Whitney's drug habit was too much and she expired.  And Adam Yauch of the Beastie Boys, Donnna Summer, and Robin Gibb all succumbed to cancer not long ago!  ALL OF THEM FAMOUS AND SUPER WEALTHY!  What a cruel joke!  If these larger than life people die, WHAT HOPE DO US MERE MORTALS HAVE?!  Oh boy!  I know that life has a meaning and purpose, but our species is quite a sad and conflicted one.  Our mortality should make us do great things and seize the moment, but it also makes us very vulnerable and worthless.  It's quite a dichotomy really.  I guess making a name for yourself or influencing others in a positive manner should be our primary goal.  We must not fear achieving what we want to, because we truly are on borrowed time.  This 74 year-old crazy hysterical German co-worker of mine truly believes she will live another 500 years because she says she is healthy and has a positive attitude.  She says the technology to keep us indefinitely alive will be around in the next decade or two thanks to stem cell research.  Of course I had to interject with, "But what if you're in a terrible car accident? Medicine can't save you from severe trauma to the body!"  She said the chances of that happening to her were low and that she cannot wait to live hundreds of years.  LMAO!  I hope her delusional outlook can sustain her as long as possible.  She just had to say, that because I am constantly depressed, I probably won't live as long as her.  GEE THANKS!!  I'm not depressed, I just know what reality is all about honey.  R-E-A-L-I-T-Y!  Besides, I'm not sure I want to have a long life anyway...

This Facebook going on the stock market.  I mean, hasn't this retarded social network been way overvalued!?  MY GOD!  I almost wish I'd never joined FAKEBOOK, but peer pressure did me in and it is a pretty good way to promote this amazing genius blog of mine.  I look at the design and can't get over the simple white interface with cheap blue and gray trim!  It's stupid!  JUST STUPID!  AND WE'VE ALL FALLEN FOR IT! ARGH!  They claim 900 MILLION USERS WORLDWIDE?!  THAT IS ASTONISHING!  The money they say is made from advertising, but I never really click those side ads and on mobile phones, you don't even see them. WHERE ARE THEY GETTING ALL THESE STAGGERING AMOUNTS OF CASH?!  All of these punks and beatches associated with FAKEBOOK are filthy rich! Mark SUCKERberg is OOGLY as hell but he's worth billions!  HOW?!  WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!  He stole the idea from others didn't he?  I haven't even seen The Social Network, but I've read the story behind the creation of this empire, and it all seems really fishy and dirty.  The twins claim Mark stole their idea, but then there's that Brazilian guy who got a share of it and gave up U.S. citizenship not long ago to avoid taxes; everyone involved in FAKEBOOK seems rather sketchy, corrupt, and super greedy, which is why I am kind of glad its stocks are not doing well!  I'd like to see it come down actually.  I've never used my real name or personal information there; I find it pointless and just another way to keep track of me.  Must be some sort of government database--posting my pics and having this blog is incriminating enough!  Many think FAKEBOOK is the apex of all social networks and that it is here to stay for a very long time, but then again MySpace was really big for a while too and it has come crashing down quick.  Nothing lasts forever, and the next bigger and better social network may be just around the corner.  American fads don't last long, especially in today's globally interconnected and highly mutative world.  I'm not going to join the next social network by the way.  I refuse to fall into these traps again.  I'm already monitored enough and I've divulged way too much already!  AHAHAHAHAHA!  Y'all know the size of my penis for crying out loud!  True friends and those who matter in your life will use the old-fashioned phone to contact you.  Plain and simple.

Miguel Bosé from Spain in the mid 80s.  A good-looking lad he was!  AND VERY GAY! LOL:

FACEBOOK IS GOING TO WALL STREET!

I thank you for reading and most especially for commenting. It motivates me to keep on writing/posting.

Do you have an office cubicle job?  I do.  I work for a government agency.  Been 11 years now!  Well, 9 really if you count all the time I've taken off! LOLOL!  I tells ya what: when I first started there it was really great.  Maybe I was in the honeymoon phase?  The place was managed pretty effectively and the employees really seemed to do their best and get the job done.  But something has happened here.  Forget my mood or work ethic going down.  The hard economic times has been a boom for our office--swamped with plenty of work but everyone is losing it and really trying to do the best they can under the increasing stressful circumstances.  I get that there are decent workers in there fighting the good fight.  But they keep hiring more people and we're running out of space!  And not all the new hires are competent or efficient !  And some of the old employees are still there just taking up space because they have seniority!  GOOD LORD MAN!  Just because someone shows up every day to work and on time does not make them a stellar employee.  I mean, you actually have to work and produce right?! But I often see people sitting at their desks doing absolutely nothing but surfing the web, or reading books, or just plain gossiping the whole day away!  Like me.  WHAT THE HELL?! Is this a problem only government jobs are prone to, or do all white-collar office jobs have this going on?!  IS THIS THE HARDWORKING AMERICA I've always heard of, or is the office now a place for people to come to and get away from their house for a few hours simply to pass the time?! LMAO!  I'm not sure if I am making my point clear here, but something is amiss!  I am grateful however for this job on so many levels!  The pay is decent.  The days off are really nice.  The medical benefits are marvelous compared to what most of America gets nowadays and the security is pretty good unlike the decaying workplaces across our country.  My stupidvisor can be a nice lady and all, but she is highly incompetent on so many levels as are many in charge there!  But she has seniority!  So she gets to keep her job!  No wonder I've slacked off the past few years!  IF SHE CAN GET AWAY WITH IT, WHY CAN'T I?  Except she shows up to work daily. And on time.  Oh well.  I'm trying to reform my deviated and irresponsible ways and get back to being a good employee like I used to be; before terrible depression and apathy took over my life and nearly destroyed me some two years ago.  I should've been doing what I love (whatever that may be) years ago, but something has kept me trapped.  It's okay.  I don't beat myself up for it anymore.  I have lots to be proud of and at least have a job!  OMG!  DID I JUST WRITE THAT?!  AHAHHAHAHA!  I feel good about myself this week.  And that's just so rare nowadays!  It may be because we're finally starting to see the collapse of the WESTERN WORLD (Greece and Europe) and my twisted morbid doomsday mind is enjoying it!  I know, I'm evil.  ;-)  Capitalism is unraveling...

Mexican author Carlos Fuentes is dead.  He was one of the world's great writers and intellectuals.  He was 83 years old and succumbed to a sudden stomach hemorrhage.  There are tons and tons of articles on his passing Tuesday afternoon.  I can't even begin to link them all here, but his death has deeply saddened me and many all over the world.  I watched this 5-part series years ago on PBS called The Buried Mirror which Carlos hosted, and he was marvelous.  It is based on a book/essay he wrote originally in Spanish (El espejo enterrado) where he discusses Spain and the conquest of Latin America.  Very very interesting and enlightening stuff.  If you can read the book or watch the series, I urge you to!  It's a great historical account/perspective on why the region is the way it is now.  Carlos was a well-traveled man and was the son of Mexican diplomats.  He grew up and lived everywhere and his English was impeccable!  A true renaissance figure with fascinating insights on his beloved Mexico; his last years alive were spent discussing his fear and concern for the increasing drug violence there.  Carlos was married twice and had a daughter with his first wife who survives him.  He suffered personal tragedy losing his two children from his second wife.  His son died of leukemia and his daughter of a drug overdose I believe--both before the age of 30.  Nevertheless, he kept on writing and traveling, always enriching his mind and us with his fabulous lectures and writings.  His most famous novels are Aura, The Death of Artemio Cruz, and Old Gringo which was made into an American film starring Jane Fonda and Gregory Peck  He never won the Nobel Prize which he so richly deserved, but Hitchcock never got an Oscar either--the world is a dumber place now that he's gone, but better for having given us this incredible man and his immortal words in print. RIP sir.

¡ VIVA CARLOS !  WATCH THIS:

JOHN TRAVOLTA IS GAY.

I'M ALIVE!  AND YOU ARE READING!  AND I AM IN A GOOD MOOD!  AND YOUR COMMENTS WILL BE GREATLY APPRECIATED AND EXPECTED EVEN!  

I was reading old blog posts from a few years back and I used to write some very interesting essays and discuss all kinds of topics--WTF HAPPENED TO ME?!  LOLOLOL!  GOOD LORD!  Has my job and love life embittered me this much?!  I'm kind of shocked at how much I've neglected this blog and been uninspired the last year or so to even write anymore!  This dreadful depression has thwarted my creativity!  I say no more!  NO MORE!  I am still surviving and have lots to be grateful for.  I am aging like fine wine and my brain can still crank out a good post!  I've got lots I could write about.  So lemme begin:

  

Okay, so Europe is in big economic trouble!  BIG!  THIS IS IT FOLKS!  The Euro is collapsing.  Greece is probably going to go back to its old currency, because they are in shambles.  Spain is f*cked too.  Italy as well.  The whole damn European Union is falling apart.  The leaders don't know what to do, and everyone that has tried to implement cuts and austere measures is getting voted out.  The people have had enough of unemployment and financial woes.  Banks are crumbling and there seems to be no end in sight.  Sound like the United States?  OF COURSE!  Listen, I don't care if Mitt Romney wins, or Obama is re-elected, our country is in big economic trouble too!  Don't for a second believe the lies about unemployment going down or that things will get better, because it's just not true!  I want you to be happy and enjoy life and keep on drinking and screwing, because we are facing some serious dire times ahead!  The middle class is being wiped out and the rich are just gonna get richer.  GREED IS DESTROYING THE WORLD!  The last politician worth voting for who at least pretended to care was Bill Clinton, but something went terribly wrong after 9/11.  America was changed forever, and I think these crooks in Congress and just about anyone in authority has now blatantly shown their true colors: THEY DO NOT CARE ABOUT US WORKING CLASS PEASANTS!  Okay, so it's nice that Obama supports gay marriage, but how is this really going to change things?  He wants votes; it's all a political move and a very historic one I must say, but the reality is that we are facing much more pressing issues!  Besides the worldwide economic depression (Japan is in bad shape too), we're now 7 billion humans on Planet Earth and the overtaxing of our resources is at an all-time dangerous high.  Mother Nature seems to be getting much more destructive; is she trying to tell us something and kicking our asses for all the abuse we've inflicted on our precious home? And have you noticed how violent and crazy people have become?  To hear of mass shooting sprees and other terrible crimes is not all that uncommon anymore and growing at an alarming rate!  

On Friday May 4th, a little over a week ago, I went to the Hollywood Bowl to see COLDPLAY!  I had been wanting tickets for the past few months, but they were sold out.  I got lucky though, and two days before the show, a friend who has connections got me last-minute tix and very good seats!  YEEHA!  They were not cheap, but so what?!  My crazy and very funny friend Roland went with me and we had a blast!  I had a little bit of pot brownie ok, but it was a very enjoyable and colorful show.  I was very energized, and those two 13 year-old white boys dancing and screaming and singing along next to us were a hoot!  LOVED THOSE KIDS!  We got along fab!  I was wondering if Nick & Nick (best friends I assume), are going to be future gay men, because their behavior was very suspect. LMAO!  They were so funny and full of life and cute as hell.  I loved their energy and I even told the older gentleman there with them (probably Dad), that I acted their age most of the time!  He smiled and appreciated my affection for the boys.  AND NO IT WAS NOT SEXUAL AT ALL, I merely saw them as nephews--they took me back to a time when I was full of life as they are now.  It was wonderful!  There were actually three shows that week, I ended up going to the final one.  My 14 year-old niece saw them earlier that same week and she loved it too.  My friend took lots of pictures, but he still hasn't posted them yet.  I'm bugging him to do so.  It's not easy to get into the Bowl; parking is a bitch and ya either gotta walk a lot uphill to get to the venue or endure a 15-minute ride on a shuttle that made me a little claustrophobic.  Once you're there though, it is a fun and magical place.   

See? Despite the falling apart of our world, I can still have a good time!  Someone here took some good video highlights of our show:

What say you?

WAT DISCUSSES NEW MUSIC TO LISTEN TO!

A bit of a humming sound in this, but I hope you enjoy my new music suggestions:

BOBBY BROWN IS STILL ALIVE.

Hi! Hope you've had a good February! I've been ok here and there. I'm happiest when amongst friends or when drinking/stoned. I know, I shouldn't have to rely on substances for my happiness, but my mind wanders and thinks of the very saddest worst things when alone and sober, and then I fall into very depressive episodes which are very hard for me to get out of. Only TWO TRULY GOOD FRIENDS of mine get what I am talking about. Everyone else is so busy or tells me to get over it ya know? I guess I shouldn't blame people for being self-absorbed or selfish; they do have THEIR own lives and issues to deal with to stop and worry or care about mine. Sadness is a very powerful emotion which I constantly struggle against though. I see the beauty in life all the time: Nature. A hug. A funny TV show. Good health. A nice meal. Stuff like that I always DO appreciate. But then the grim stuff takes over: Nasty evil people. My mortality. Loving those I shouldn't. My annoying job. I wish this kind of negative thinking did not plague me, but I can't deny that it does. I look in the mirror. Do I like the man that I see? Sometimes I do! Sometimes I do see a very handsome man staring right back and I feel most fortunate for having these genes. Other times I feel I'm not tanned enough, nor muscular enough, but I live in this superficial hellhole LA, so I guess it's understandable. LOL! Anyway, nothing really new to report about my life. I still have my physical health, but mentally and emotionally I do falter sometimes. The good news? I ALWAYS MANAGE TO BEAT MY DEMONS! I ALWAYS TRIUMPH. ALWAYS!!! Now gimme a hug and a kiss...

So I've been fascinated by Greta Garbo as of late. GRETA F*CKING GARBO! The great Swedish DIVA MOVIE SUPERSTAR! This was a very very interesting lady I must say! She was very close to her family and started acting lessons and other jobs in front of the camera while growing up in Sweden. Somehow though she got noticed by Louis B. Mayer (head of MGM) and her director friend and her came to Hollywood when she was still a teenager in the early 1920's or so I believe. She was a natural beauty when shown in front of a camera. She started off in silent films, then moved on to talkies and triumphed even further as one big giant popular movie star. At one point, she was the highest paid of them all, earning about $300,000 a film in the 1930s! WOW! In those days that was a lot of cash! Hell it still is a lot of moola! She had that cool accent and very nice cheekbones, LOL! She worked for only about twenty years and made about 25 AMERICAN movies before retiring from HOLLYWOOD in the 1940s. THIS IS QUITE REMARKABLE because she was only in her mid-thirties! The right roles never came again, and she was a very very private woman anyway. She hated publicity, attending movie premieres and parties, or having to sign autographs. She was quite the loner. She spent the rest of her life in NEW YORK CITY living off the money she had already made. Every time she went out, she'd wear large hats and sunglasses to keep the paparazzi from getting a good picture of her. Garbo was certainly unique for her mysterious and carefully protected private life. Many claim she had affairs not just with men but with women as well. She lived a long life and finally died in 1990 at the age of 84 with a net worth of about 32 million dollars. NOT BAD! NOT BAD AT ALL! I've seen three of her films I think: Grand Hotel, Ninotchka, and Queen Christina; the latter being my favorite.

You gotta go to YouTube directly to view this documentary on the very enigmatic Ms. Garbo, but it is pretty good:

http://youtu.be/ENFAp088qAk

TIM TEBOW LOVES JESUS.

How's yer 2012 so far? Mine has been cruising along...

I am about 6ft. 2 inches tall and have now reached a nice healthy weight of about 175lbs! This is most exciting to me because I've been so painfully thin most of my life, and in 2010 when I was going through terrible heartbreak, I went down to about 150lbs. It was quite horrible lemme tells ya; I looked HOLOCAUSTIC and very ill. Just this past week, two different people remarked that I'm sporting quite a beautiful bod these days. IS THIS NOT WONDERFUL TO HEAR?! OF COURSE IT IS! WHY LIE?! To hear genuine compliments is very uplifting. This world is full of so many mean nasty horrible jealous people; when one runs into honest praise, it can really make a difference in one's self-esteem. I grew up in a very dysfunctional family, and compliments were not passed around very often; then came the mean kids in school of course! One thing I was often told when I was a kid was that I was intelligent and my dad reassured me when I was a teen that it did not matter that I was skinny, he said I would get far because I have a big d*ck. LMAO! Well, the old man was right I suppose, but I want to be the complete package now into my adulthood! Here in my late thir...TWENTIES (excuse me), I think I've reached the best looks of my life yet. All I need now is some laser resurfacing to remove some acne scars on my face. Maybe a good airbrush tan would help? I know I know, I'm trying to be all HOLLYWOOD now, but why not? Why not take pride in one's looks? I'd like to whiten my choppers a bit more as well, but that is definitely going to be painful because I have very sensitive teeth. Maybe the fake tan will take care of it and make my teeth seem super white for good. LOL! So I've now achieved a very nice lean, but toned look, thanks in part to my daily routine of push-ups in the morning. Push-ups are a godsend and I do them much more effortlessly than even a year ago! They really do give ya a nice athletic look. Someone else just a few months ago remarked I had achieved a nice V-shape look to my torso. AHAHAHAHHAAHAA. It's taken a long time to reach this gay milestone my friends. Eat your heart out Adam Levine!

I'm going to talk about poppers. If you're a homo, I'm only stating the obvious. These little bottles of what they call "video head cleaner" or "liquid incense" are very powerful inhaled chemicals that bring a rush of euphoria and sexual desire to the user. It used to be amyl nitrate I believe, which was used for those suffering from angina, but then the gays somehow discovered them and they became all the rage in the 70s when disco was QUEEN and free sex was enjoyed in all its glory. Then AIDS came around and there were theories that poppers were the direct cause of AIDS, but it wasn't true, it was just that they made ya hornier and more prone to having unsafe condomless sex. Anyway, poppers are fun and they relax your butthole and turn you into a raging ravenous SEXUAL BEAST. I had never tried them, nor was I interested for many many years. But then I was stoned out of my mind once and inhaled a bit and the rest is history. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! The combination of 420 and poppers has got to be the most exhilarating sexual experience in the history of humanity. By themselves, I get a headache and dizzy, but on weed they are marvelously erotic. They can't be good for you though. They must do some sort of long-term damage which I am not fully aware of yet, nor can anyone prove it through many articles I have read. UGH! Whatever man. Something will kill ya one of these days! MIGHT AS WELL ENJOY THIS SHORT BIZARRE RIDE RIGHT?! Mind you, many gay men DO NOT like poppers because they complain of the headaches and other side effects, so it is not for everybody. You still gotta have the right chemistry with your sexual partner, or it will inevitably be lame sex anyway, despite the brief moment of DESIRE you feel. Nothing replaces true sexual or relationship chemistry, no matter what drug you use! It's the closest thing to meth sex, without the horrors of becoming a speed addict. I'd love to hear your thoughts on POPPERS! REALLY!

I LOVE THIS JEW! I REALLY DO! ONE OF THE FUNNIEST MEN ALIVE:

TWENTY TWELVE IS HERE.

I'M ALIVE! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! IT'S GOING TO BE A ROLLERCOASTER RIDE THIS 2012!!! ARE YOU READY?!

Well, well, well! Lemme give ya a recap of things. November sucked! I had the flu most of the month and Thanksgiving really depressed me. Yes. I was so depressed! We had good food and all, but I was most blue. Then December came. Not much better I'm afraid. I did get over that horrible flu, but then I had to deal with a cough. And what a cough! UGH! It was very annoying and quite debilitating. I wasn't alone, as many people were quite sick as well. My mother has me a bit worried actually, she has a cough that won't quit, but Imma give her some strong meds I got last week that I never used for my cough, because mine is almost gone. So far this post is riveting ain't it?! AREN'T YOU JUST GRIPPED WITH MY WRITING?! LOLOLOL! I tells ya what, I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad the holidays are over. Not a big fan. My cousin and her husband drove from Oklahoma to spend Xmas with us, and it was most nice to have them, but I feel like all this forced holiday cheer is bogus and BORING! Anyway, I'm on the hunt for a more fulfilling and satisfying job, so keep your fingers crossed. I have a feeling this will be THE YEAR for my career! DID YA READ THAT?! YES! HOPE FOR BETTER PROSPECTS! I can't believe it myself!

I love a new year, because it is a fresh start. A clean slate to begin with. Resolutions are a good thing! Let's be honest though people. This year is going to suck! IT IS GOING TO BITE! There are so many crazy people out there. And it is only going to get worse. Psychos that like to go on shooting sprees are becoming the norm, and it is quite disturbing. It makes me want to get armed for the first time in my life; my own gun to protect myself. This country is so violent! And the nutjobs that are not in institutions where they belong or people who are not taking their meds is at an all-time high. The economy is wrecked and going further into the toilet. Unemployment only gets higher. It's all a recipe for severe societal unrest and locos going berserk. And I don't think it's just confined to our country either. I feel it's a global issue. I don't know if Mother Earth is going to smack us with more natural disasters, but that's not what concerns me--it's the mental health of humanity as a whole that does. I'm crazy in my own way, but there are scary sociopaths out there ready to snap at any moment. A rise in crime and violence is a terrible frightening thing. Sadly, I believe this is what is coming to a decaying world and to us here in the U.S. This country has had it good for so long, but something is amiss. People are not normal and taking it out on others. I hope I am wrong, but my prediction is a rise in crime and crazies doing some awful horrible violent things.

Me personally though? I can only thrive. I feel it. I hope you do too.

What do you predict for this new year? Comments are obligatory!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN 2011.

Halloween season! IT IS MY FAVORITE TIME OF YEAR! Ghosts, witches, goblins, zombies, vampires, and werewolves! I LOVE IT! Don't you?! It's fun!

As I enter middle ag...ER, my mid twenties, I am starting to reflect on my life. I feel regret for having hurt certain people. Whether it was deliberately or unintentionally; although I truly feel I've never done anything with malice or on purpose. Ya see, I do have a conscience. And I do feel guilt. And I happen to have empathy. I really wish I were a colder and uncaring bastard, but that is only the facade I seem to present to the world. I'm sarcastic, cynical, and quite silly with my sense of humour. The real ME is very sentimental and easily moved. I've been pretty fortunate in my life. I've always had a roof over my head, food, and basic necessities to survive. My nagging mother has been pretty good to me despite our sometimes heated disagreements. I happen to have at least two or three good friends in whom I can confide and tell my deepest secrets and thoughts to without being judged or mocked. That is sooooooooo important to have ya know? We all need to be heard/listened to, but it is hard to find an accepting audience. I've been fortunate not to have any serious financial problems or health issues. My worst enemy has sadly been my own mind and my emotions. I'm way too sensitive and having to grow up in the real world has been a very humbling and almost unbearable lesson at times. I do give humans the benefit of the doubt and try to believe in people, but sadly I have been disappointed way too often. I'm trying not to be bitter or spiteful, but it is hard. There is EVIL in this world folks. There are those among us who do not care, love, or feel guilt at all. I come from a very dysfunctional broken home, and I have had to face the world carrying that dumb awful baggage, which I am slowly but barely still getting rid of to this day. I cry a lot easier now than ever in my life, only because I've had to accept tough lessons about love and other general disappointments. The good thing is: I have faith that everything will work out and I shall triumph despite recent trials and tribulations in the past few years. Someone keeps telling me I'm going to live a very long healthy life and that I shall die peacefully. Okay then. I'll take it! LOL. I hope I look this good at 95!

Okay, it is Halloween time, and I wanna talk about serial killers! I've probably discussed this topic somewhat before, but let's take another STAB at it! EVIL IS REAL! No remorse, no empathy, no guilt; the serial killer is one twisted mindf*cked human being. Jack the Ripper is the most famous and perhaps the first "celebrity" serial killer. He terrorized London during the height of the British Empire and Victorian Age and became a sensation for his murder of prostitutes and his meticulous surgical destruction of the corpses. There's a good film on this topic called From Hell starring Johnny Depp. Serial killers are found the world over and are usually males who grew up wetting their beds late into their teens, abused or killed animals, and had a fascination with fire. Ted Bundy was handsome and educated and brutally murdered tons of pretty girls. John Wayne Gacy was a respected family man and member of his community that got off by killing young men and boys because he was a self-hating homosexual. He used to dress as a clown for kids' parties whilst burying bodies under his house. THE STENCH MAN! UGH! Jeffrey Dahmer became world famous for keeping body parts and eating them in his apartment. YIKES! He was a nice-looking unassuming man that had one SICK mind! Richard Ramirez terrorized L.A. during the summer of 1985. Known as the Night Stalker, this oogly S.O.B. was a Satanist that broke into people's homes and killed mercilessly. One of the creepiest and most fascinating serial killers was the Zodiac up in the Bay area. He was never caught! The Jakey G. film Zodiac is long but interesting to check out. All you've ever wanted to know about these sickos is at this link right here! I cringe to think of who has yet to be caught!

CHUCKY! SUCH LANGUAGE! LOLOL:

THE N WORD, REVISITED.

My brother insists I blog! I know I know, it's been a while. What is there to talk about? Hmmm...

I'll have to discuss one of my favorite topics of the last two years or so: NARCISSISM! Yeah, so if you're sick of it and not in the mood or just plain don't believe me when I tell you of the destruction these people create in the normally good and decent around them, then stop reading. But if you wanna learn and be informed and open your eyes to something that is rarely discussed and given attention to, but needs to be given proper coverage, then continue forth! Ya know that horrible c*ntrag Joan Crawford as depicted in the film MOMMIE DEAREST by Faye Dunaway? Yes, that psychotic evil twisted movie star bitch that abuses her daughter and acts like the world revolves her? Yes my friends, that is a NARCISSIST. Or the malicious terrible ghetto trash puta that Mo'nique so convincingly plays in PRECIOUS? Yes, that is a NARCISSIST. But let's not forget the more subtle, more delicate yet still manipulative and emotionally destructive witch in 500 DAYS OF SUMMER. Yes, she is a NARCISSIST. In all the movies I just used as examples, women are the perpetrators, but more often than not it is MEN that are guilty of having this personality disorder. Daniel Day-Lewis' amazing performance in There Will Be Blood for example; that character is a NARCISSIST. How would I ever have known about these energy vampires had I not fallen for one? He was so charming, so sweet, so seemingly gentle and caring. But it's all a front. A mask. For once it slips off and they know they've got you hooked in, their assault on your soul begins. So many times I heard other naysayers tell me, "GET OVER IT! BIG DEAL! YOU'RE SO DRAMATIC!" Oh really now? Well, when you come from a dysfunctional family where two of the main adults in my life were savage NARCISSISTS, and then you end up developing feelings for one in adulthood, I think it's safe to say I got some really bad lessons about what a healthy relationship is all about. Yes, they are usually successful and very ambitious and liked by many, but this does not eliminate their abusive nature or self-absorbed ways. They do not know what love is, and sadly they never will. They hate intimacy and sensitive people. They feel unique and misunderstood. No, it's not just a jerk or bitch you're dealing with folks. You're dealing with a truly damaged and malignant soul. Am I narcissistic? Why yes. To a certain degree I am! Sure! But I'm not a NARCISSIST. A true narcissist is just plain EVIL. And I know some that at this point in their lives are trying desperately to change and be better people towards others, but this is rare, for most (like my self-absorbed FATHER), never change and are proud of it. Remember, you are not a person, you are an object. To be used and discarded. Plain and simple. Eerie and depressing isn't it?

Yes, the NARCISSIST may be good looking, financially successful, and appear to have it all. But here's the catch: they don't care about your thoughts, your opinions, your feelings, or YOU. Period. You're just an object that is doing its job for now, until someone else "better" comes along. The victim who willfully enters a relationship with one of these douches is then put through a mindf*ck of epic proportions. Some days, the NARCISSIST is fun, nice, and sweet all over again just like the first time he lured you in. This is meant to confuse and keep the victim hooked in. But then the real true bastard comes through once again, and he's abusive, condescending, withdrawn, and just plain horrible to you. The victim (AND YES THERE IS A VICTIM) has lost their self-esteem, does not know how to get away from him, and is confused and truly hurt. Once the victim decides they've had enough of this douchebag and wants to leave, the NARCISSIST does everything to beg, manipulate, or even threaten to keep that person with them. A NARCISSIST doesn't want YOU to end the relationship! NO! He/she has to end it! THEY HAVE TO BE VICTORIOUS! They have to have the last word/laugh! DUH! Don't you get it? Don't you see their modus operandi by now?! This woman beautifully explains it in this article. I'd give her a Pulitzer if I could. Even if the victim has managed to escape and cut all ties with Donald Trump, the recovery from one of these beasts will take a long time and many tears will be shed mourning Mr. Asshole. Don't I know it from personal experience. Oh boy. My mother knows it from dealing with my late father. Nicole Simpson knew it, and got murdered by her NARCISSIST. Yikes. This is no joke folks. This is no sweep-it-under-the rug issue. This is serious and highly destructive. These people are psychopaths. Even if they don't physically murder someone, they are pretty lethal and damaging nonetheless to the sensitive and giving souls out there. I like and admire the achievements of Madonna, Pablo Picasso, and the recently deceased Steve Jobs, but this does not mean they are/were good kind sweet caring people with empathy for others--all narcissists, all of them abusive. The only way to successfully deal with these heathens is to keep them at a distance and deal with them here and there once in a while. Better yet, cut them out of your life completely if you can! For to be in love or related to them is to invite nothing but suffering.

I shall never EVER be the same person again. Forever changed and scarred. And this is a good thing! Waking up and realizing what I was dealing with my whole life and carrying with me into my recent adulthood is very eye-opening! I've been mocked, criticized, scoffed at, and dismissed by even my closest friends about this subject and my harrowing experience. But as this writer so brilliantly puts it: "Does all this sound far-fetched and like a lame made-for-TV movie? Then you’ve never had an encounter with a narcissist."

I'm sure I'll come back to this subject sometime in the near future. Lucky YOU. LOLOL! In the meantime, I'm waiting to see what happens to the world economy...

"IN SPACE, NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU SCREAM."

I did not want the month of August to end without at least ONE blog post, so here I am! WHERE OH WHERE HAS THIS YEAR GONE KIDS?! LOVING MY NEW HOME BY THE WAY! LOVE IT! Thank you SO MUCH for still reading and most of all for commenting! This post is of major importance, so PLEASE FOLLOW IT CAREFULLY:

Is something major and catastrophic going to happen on or around September 26, 2011? Apparently every time some comet aligns with the Earth astronomically speaking, we have a major quake somewhere in the world. The last three times have been along the Pacific Rim, with quakes hitting Chile, New Zealand, and Japan. I'm hoping L.A. is spared; yeah, I love catastrophes and chaos because I'm twisted and evil like that, but it's much more fun to sit back and watch live coverage on the Internet or television! LOL! If Los Angeles were to have a disaster, I'd be caught in the middle of it, and it would really suck not to have electricity or water! HAHA! Anyway, here's hoping I'm not jinxing my city and the other 10 million souls living here, although we could benefit from many bastards and bitches getting killed in a good-sized temblor. So much going on! WHAT AN EXCITING TIME TO BE ALIVE! Global communication is instant nowadays with any natural or man-made disaster or event being reported within minutes! The thing that makes it all more devastating is the large population of heathen...er, HUMANS living on the Earth. 7 BILLION PEOPLE?! THAT'S OUTRAGEOUS MAN! I suppose all this crazy stuff has happened in the past, but it's much more serious now when you have so many lives at stake. The tornadoes this year were terrible, and that rare 5.8 quake in D.C. and surrounding areas last week made me think of the NEW MADRID fault and the frightening scenario of a massive quake in an area of the U.S. that does not really have building codes! YIKES!

In all honesty, with all the weird sh*t taking place on this planet, my focus this year has been more on the universe! How truly small and insignificant we are when compared to our Solar System (look at this picture of the Earth from the surface of Mars), and how even more trivial WE BE when compared to our place in the Milky Way galaxy! Then you start to think of all the other galaxies out there, and it becomes a bit unnerving and totally incomprehensible. IT'S JUST MINDBLOWING FOLKS! Billions of galaxies with billions of stars and planets--there has to be "intelligent" life out there besides our lame asses! Like George Lucas envisioned and beat us over the head--with his popular franchise--I often wonder if there is a galaxy out there where they trade and fight wars between planets and can travel freely and effortlessly in ships or through stargates! CAN YOU BLOODY IMAGINE?! And no, I'm not stoned as I write this post either. LOLOLOL! I talk about this with my Woody Harrelson lookalike buddy/co-worker often and his knowledge on this topic is very very good. Of course, there are those among us who have seen UFOs and have suffered abductions (like my beloved bud at this blog), who would swear that beings from other planets have already visited us and continue to monitor and study our species very carefully. My mother --for crying out loud --swears she clearly and undeniably saw a UFO earlier this year outside her bedroom window where we used to live! So much to fathom, to study, to research, and to learn! Thank God for the Internet right?! I can safely bet that waste of space slut whore Kim Kardashian doesn't spend time even thinking about these incredible and fascinating topics.

Did we ever even go to the Moon? And if we did, why did we never go back after 1972? A new major Hollywood motion picture directed by an unknown Spaniard, Apollo 18, explores the terrifying idea that aliens scared the bejesus out of our NASA astronauts and warned us to never return. EEK! Makes my skin crawl! Watch this brief British documentary here. SO VERY CREEPY! The Hollywood movie trailer on this very subject/event is here:

SEVEN YEARS LATER...

A BLOG POST! A BLOG POST! OH MA DEAR BELOVED GOD! AND TODAY MARKS THE SEVENTH ANNIVERSARY OF THIS BLOG TOO! SO YOU ARE MORE THAN ENCOURAGED; YOU ARE OBLIGATED QUITE FRANKLY TO LEAVE A COMMENT!

Well, it's been tough to just write as of late. I've taken up exercising again and I am seeing some early decent results which is a bit motivating. You've heard of the P90X workout program? Yes, my friend was kind enough to burn me the whole set of DVDs and I'm in my third week. Okay so I kind of skip the YOGA day because it's 90 minutes and it is a bit grueling and boring and it seems to take an eternity to get through, but everything else I've been sticking to and lemme tells ya it is HARD WORK. The workouts tend to be about an hour long and they are very diverse and definitely interesting; supposedly I'll be ripped in about three months or so. Unlike sex, after about 30 minutes though I am really really tired! The last half hour is the hardest for me. I really feel winded and out of it and to just lay on the floor and close my eyes is almost as good as an orgasm. So I'm working out really hard about four days and two days I do some abs and blah blah blah. It's nice not to have to go to the gym and deal with the parking and crowds and monthly stupid fee so this system is perfect in that you don't need all that fancy equipment and stuff. Anyway, it has put me in a better mood since they say exercising does help with depression and my sex drive seems to be really revved up. Anyway, if you're looking to get moving and stop being sedentary, this is a good program although you better be prepared to keep up and be careful not to get injured. And I drink those protein shakes after each workout which taste really good and hopefully will turn me into a hot ADONIS by the end of the summer. The main trainer and designer is this dude named Tony Horton who's about 50 and in incredible enviable shape and his positive silly attitude makes me want to hurl, but ya can't blame the guy for loving life and looking the way he does. YES SOME PEOPLE ACTUALLY LOVE LIFE! LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Okay so not only is it this blog's seventh anniversary, but it's also my birthday okay? Yes, another year to add to my RIVETING life! Well, I'm still alive and still going so there must be a purpose for me on here right? Even more shocking is how amazingly good I look for my age! YEAH! Oh my God, I'm such a NARCISSIST! LOL! I'm slowly but surely inching towards the big FOUR-O, but everyone is pretty impressed at how well I maintain myself, despite some dark moments there in the last two years. UGH. I owe my youthful appearance to lots of sleep, little to no sun exposure, and good genes I suppose. And this past weekend I saw my dear old friend who now lives in Chicago at the local karaoke bar and it was fun! I hope she posts our pics soon so I can share with all of you. She hilariously calls me her GAY HUSBAND and there are now actual shots of both of us kissing! YEOOOOOOOOOOOOW! She's a sweet silly gal who thinks I'm handsome. Well, that's sweet/kind of you to say my dear and cruel of life that I'm not straight ain't it?! OH! I've officially moved to a new place near my old one! NO MORE MORTGAGE! Renting like everyone else and it feels liberating! I posted the pics on Facebook here so you can see. And my best BEST bud got me a brand new digital TV for my bday! WOOHOO! Ain't that super nice?! Well, leave a comment okay? PLEASE!!! HAPPY SEVENTH BLOGIVERSARY! And Happy Birthday to me too!

I don't know if Katy Perry is going to score a fifth #1 hit off her Teenage Dream album with this song, but it is already in the Top Ten and the video is terrific with some great cameos by Hanson, Kenny G, Corey Feldman, and Debbie Gibson:

¡ VIVA MEXICO !

What do I write about when quite frankly, I don't feel inspired to write about anything at all anymore! I may just have to shut down my awesome little blog here after seven years of philosophical, existential, and journalistic awesomeness! Unless I have a sudden burst/surge of writing creativity in the near future? Well, my life is rather bland I suppose. Routine. Monotonous. I mean, I have been trying to have fun and enjoy the good times when they arrive and stuff, but as of late I feel kind of detached from it all. I guess this is a good thing in a way, but at the same time I feel kind of robotic. On automatic pilot. I have a decent job and entertaining co-workers who at least like to be silly and laugh at the stupidities I find funny as well, but I dunno why I feel so blah now. I was feeling massive depression and sadness for a good while there, only to be replaced now with a kind of lost and apathetic feeling! Ok, so I'll count my blessings. I'd rather feel the way I do now, than to break down and cry! I'LL TAKE IT! MY GOD MAN! THAT WAS SOME HORRIBLE MOURNING THERE! UGH! Tears have to be shed in order to become stronger?! CHRIST ALMIGHTY! NOOOOOOOOO!!! I've been quite spiritual lately, praying a lot (in a Christian sense) and it seems to be yielding results. Atheism seems to be growing a lot lately and is the current fad among many people I know, which is fine and all, but I feel a spiritual connection right now with a higher power that I do not with any human being here in this f*cked up world.

Speaking of this f*cked up world, I was looking at blogs and other sites online recently about the drug trafficking war in Mexico and this is a NIGHTMARE! The daily killings of civilians and authority figures is downright shocking and horrific! These criminals are no joke, and do not mess or get in their way; rival cartels battle each other and are massacring whomever they can to send a message that they are in charge of these towns and that the money coming in is good enough to commit all kinds of atrocious murders. Frankly, if the United States were not so addicted to drugs, this problem would not exist, but we have a culture that loves to get high. Common graves are found with corpses all the time in border towns, people get decapitated frequently, and two dudes were found lifeless and hanging from an overpass bridge this past week. Gruesome and gory man! EEK! What is gonna be done to stop this mess?! The police in Mexico are accused to be in on it due to bribing and the U.S. and Mexican federal governments have no real solution to this growing terrible problem, nor do I think they care. In the past five years or so of this disturbing upsurge in violence, more than 35,000 people have been killed. The cartels are organized and heavily armed, with most of the weapons manufactured here in the good ole' U.S.A. They send our troops into Iraq or Afghanistan, when we've got this kind of serious trouble right in our back yard?! YIKES MAN! This kind of crime is already spilling into our country and if economic conditions continue to deteriorate here, GOD HELP US. It's really sad to see all of this happening, especially when I actually find certain Mexicans quite sexually attractive at times. LOL!

This is a BRILLIANT movie trailer. THE LONG-AWAITED SEQUEL TO E.T. IS FINALLY HERE! WATCH:

♪ "I CAN'T TAKE IT TAKE IT TAKE NO MORE, NEVER FELT LIKE FELT LIKE THIS BEFORE..." ♫

I've been very lazy and suffering from terrible writer's block as of late; thanks to anyone who still visits and comments on my silly posts:

So there are no dead photos to be released of the most popular terrorist in modern times? And his body was dumped into the ocean?! WHAT?! I used to believe the official 9/11 story for about two years, and then I began to question and research all kinds of information on my own. I just can't understand how FOUR planes were so easily hijacked that morning, with three of them hitting their targets so successfully. The average citizen was definitely caught off guard, and we were all pretty shocked and horrified at the magnitude of the event, but I know the government was not that unaware--the FBI and CIA have a history of cover-ups and corruption don't ya know? We used to be friends with Saddam Hussein, and then he became an enemy in a terribly expensive unnecessary war were no WMDs were ever found. The whole entire War on Terror has bankrupted this country and implemented ridiculous security measures that don't guarantee our safety. Saddam and his two sons were not dumped into the ocean right away mind you. I hate to doubt or question all this mess, but I DO. Frankly I do. Label me a conspiracy theorist then. I used to really love and stand behind this country, but the last decade and previous presidency left me exhausted and very disillusioned and disenfranchised. Movies like V for Vendetta, Network and the gold mine that is the Internet have opened my mind and made me realize that what the official media tells us may not be the truth after all. Brainwashing the masses is very easy and effective. Osama had tons of porn and plans for more terror attacks and blah blah blah. The story just gets more bizarre and weird by the day; I thought the man had kidney disease?! Anyway...

I've recently picked up going to the movies again. It had been a long while actually. I saw THOR on Mother's Day with mom and friends and it was entertaining. Ever since my depressive crisis of 2010, my life has never felt or been the same again. I dunno. I'm probably repeating myself, but it's as if I've been forever transformed. I guess we all go through something similar that changes us for good, but I frankly don't like what it's done to me; at times I feel lost/confused and angry that I fell for someone who did not feel the same about me. I know life is unfair and we don't always get what we want and that I am hugely blessed in many ways and that I have come out of that deep terrible dark moment pretty decently, but I still don't feel like my old more carefree self like I once did. It'd be nice to finally settle down and build something substantial, but then I wonder if I am not just deluding myself with fairy tale dreams and the ridiculous idea of wanting to be in love. I just hate this "new" me. I F*CKING HATE/DESPISE IT. A sentimental big giant crybaby fool is what I've become and it irks me. I'm human after all, but WHY DAMN IT?! WHY?! There's plenty of hot dudes in the world right? So much to still see and do correct?! A whole life still ahead of me n'est-ce pas? Yeah right. I try to enjoy each day and be thankful for the little things, but sometimes my sadness overwhelms me and takes over. I resent it. Just like Lady Gaga who breaks down and cries before her Monster Ball Tour concert that recently aired on HBO where she feels that she's not good or competent enough--that's how I often feel! Add to it living in this superficial gay sh*thole Los Angeles where I am nowhere near as good-looking as these narcissistic A-HOLES and I frankly do feel ugly at times, even though I'm an attractive man regardless. Anyway, you can see how tormented I've become; not that I wasn't before, but now I just break down easily, like that guy John Boehner in Congress. LOL! UGH. F*ck this sh*t. Pointless annoying sentimentality which only makes me needlessly suffer. THANKS LIFE! THANKS A LOT! I've been cursed. I pray and pray for it to go away...

I'll leave ya with some Britney. I frankly do wish the world would just blow up and end. Life is fun and cool at times--it's the misery and BS I cannot stand which makes me wish for an asteroid to hit the planet more often than not! At least this retarded top ten hit song is catchy:

TRUMP FOR PRESIDENT?! EEK!!!

My modem at home has been acting up and is not connecting properly so here I am at work trying to sneak a post in. Sorry for any typos or odd sentences:

One of the things I want to vehemently clear up in this post is the distinction between a victim and an abuser. So many times, abuse by an evil person is directed at someone else verbally, emotionally, or physically and others try to justify or understand why the perpetrator did it. "Well he/she had a bad childhood or they don't know any better and this is why they abuse..." OH REALLY NOW?! I don't care what the person's past or hardship has been or may currently be, ABUSE IS NEVER TO BE JUSTIFIED OR EXCUSED IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM! NOR TOLERATED NOR ACCEPTED! An abusive person needs to be reprimanded and dealt with according to the law, and one should get away from them as soon as possible. Sadly, even victims tend to want to make excuses or feel sorry for their abusers, by trying to only see their good side or because they love him/her. Kind of what happens with Stockholm Syndrome. Anyway, as someone who has been emotionally and verbally abused myself, I have never made excuses for the people who have done this to me. F*CK THAT. Evil is real, and these savage poor wastes of space deserve to be punished and made aware of their misdeeds. No one deserves to be abused so terribly by someone else who wants nothing but to exert their control and power over YOU. Shall we feel sorry for what O.J. Simpson went through which lead him to beat and finally brutally kill his ex-wife? Poor Ted Bundy and Adolf Hitler! WRONG! NO! Some people are just plain wicked and need to be dealt with. Let their feet swing...

The sad truth is, today's job market is a nightmare. Recent college grads are no longer finding work and many have to move back home and live with their parents working odd jobs or searching endlessly for that first REAL job which doesn't seem to ever come. Middle-aged people who have had their jobs for years and get laid off are in even more dire straits. The unemployment situation in this country is profoundly serious, and the consequences of people being out of work like this is not good. This is the kind of crap that happens in Mexico or Hati, where lots of unemployed folk turn to crime to "make ends meet." THE THIRD WORLD BABY! I just ran into a friend who is in his mid-thirties and lost his job a few months ago and he cannot find work; to the point where the man will leave California in a year if nothing materializes. What this does to one's self-esteem and mood is devastating. All this official unemployment data you get out of the government is a bunch of baloney, the numbers are much higher. But you go on believing them okay? You go on being distracted by Dancing with the Stars and Justin Bieber and the latest antics of those losers on Jersey Shore while the country sinks further and further into the worst economic depression in its history. A bunch of our good jobs have been outsourced, the unions are being cracked down on for egregious corruption, and the greed of this ridiculously individualistic capitalist system has now been exposed. The whole damn system is one giant decomposing festering deer cadaver complete with maggots and ants! AH THE IMAGERY! LOL! McDonald's hiring 50,000 recently?! THIS IS THE AMERICAN DREAM NOWADAYS?! EEK!

Katy Perry is married to that super douchebag Russell Brand, but her pop star career is another matter. She is on fire! Four #1 singles off her current album alone! This is no easy or small feat:

LET THE GOVERNMENT SHUT DOWN.

This is one depressing lonely place for a decent relationship I'm afraid; if you're a gay man that is. The dudes in this town are highly superficial: gym bod, tan, and a career in modeling/entertainment are required, or else you're less than trash. And THOSE jocks are quite lonely themselves too, because who can stand being around a narcissist anyway right?! The really hot ones also tend to have the personality and sex skills of a sea urchin anyway. BORING! Yes, I'd like a handsome good-looking one myself with a nice face, decent body, and fresh breath/nice teeth, but I can accept a few imperfections here and there okay? UGH. I dunno man. I used to be liberated and carefree and did not care about settling down, until HE happened to me, and it's been all downhill ever since then. WHAT HAPPENED?! Is this what becoming mature is supposed to be like? I've actually grown tired of the casual sex and one-night stands?! ME?! OMG! THIS IS MADNESS! ARGH! What I really don't understand is how people can get into and out of relationships effortlessly like changing a song on their iPod. It's pretty amazing and quite frankly, I don't know how that even happens. Aren't you supposed to feel giddy feelings of being in love? Isn't that supposed to happen very rarely? I guess I don't fall that easily and don't feel that spark often at all. I must be damaged. I'm starting to lose hope. At least in L.A. In other more REAL places, I'm sure I would have found a cool hottie long ago. But dating here? A NIGHTMARE. I have no problem getting laid, but no one seems to fall madly in love with me. This makes me a bit sad and I feel very inadequate quite frankly...

Some two weeks ago, the tooth pain I was experiencing was driving me up the wall. I had to get my first ever root canal. How come no one told me that it took so long to get one done?! ARGH! Thank God my dentist is one cool awesome dude with very soft delicate hands. Anyway, I'm glad he killed the nerves and the pain has gone away. I have a temp crown for now as they manufacture my new permanent one in a lab somewhere. I'm getting new glasses soon too, after a long lengthy annoying eye exam last week. I'd been sporting this cool facial hair scruff recently, but I'm tired of having to trim and maintain the grass so I pretty much got rid of it tonight. I look five years younger already! Been doing push-ups and stuff to get some exercise into my life, and although I'm looking nice and more toned as of late, I'm still pretty thin and not meeting L.A. standards on muscle. WHY SHOULD I EVEN BUY INTO ALL THIS PHONY IMAGE BALONEY RIGHT?! Damn I'm lonely, so very lonely...

I can't get this song out of my head as of late. She's finally really grown on me I tells ya: