Friday, November 02, 2012


Halloween was quiet and spent with a friend watching all kinds of silly TV, but I enjoyed myself tremendously nonetheless!  Must've been the enhanced chocolate I had.  Catch my drift? LOL!  Thank God for THC!  It makes me very giggly, hungry, and super horny.  MY MY!  

I haven't blogged much the last few months because I've been busy thinking too much and not being able to put it into words.  There is so much going on really.  Summer was horrendous here in L.A.  For weeks, temperatures were very hot and nights were really really humid.  Even as of this date, we are still going through pretty warm temps, but at least the nights have cooled down considerably, making sleep a little easier.  Werk has been dismal!  We have a new supervisor in charge who started off very sweet and phony, but soon revealed her true colours as a micro-managing whore of epic proportions!  OMG!  I cannot stand this woman!  She's Eastern European and her English is atrocious, but she's calling some heavy shots now and I have to answer to this bitch!  UGH!  How horrid!  How utterly horrid!  Yes, she's doing her job alright and I need to take my job more seriously than I do and I should be grateful to be employed in this economy and blah blah blah!  OH LORD!  My hedonistic leisurely mind/brain just don't want to process all this boring retarded reality.  It truly depresses me.  Depresses me so much to have to live in this world full of so much hypocrisy, lies, and sh*tty f*cking people.  There are times when I have really cool plans to hang with friends and I feel dreadfully sad and weepy, but I still have to put on a happy face despite my sometimes treacherous bleak moods.  The irony being, I look better than ever!  LMAO!  I even went to the opera twice in early October, dressed to the nines baby!  How can a man like myself look so good, and feel so tortured sometimes?!  I have stopped going to many bars/clubs due to the fact I'm no longer enjoying myself at these places and feel quite lonely there, opting instead to hang with a friend or two at their house/apartment; I'd much rather watch TV or a movie these days than spend an evening with gay dudes that are way too young and narcissistic or trolls who are past their prime and want young meat.   

I know Mitt Romney is a douchebag, but I'm afraid Obama is not much better, and this coming election will not stop the continuing collapse of the economy.  Americans still want to blindly believe in our lame political process, but do not want to see what our corrupt politicians have done to destroy our country.  The downfall began on 9/11 and continues to this day.  Europe is in ruins, and we are not that far off unfortunately.  Anyway, the two-party polluted system is still the norm, and it frustrates me to not have a third or fourth choice to pick from with a viable chance of winning!  ARGH!  And now ya got this really bad storm Sandy that has wrecked the East Coast and the mainstream media forgot all about the poorer countries like Haiti and Cuba of course, and NYC got all this amazing coverage like it's the center of the f*cking universe and I know there's been terrible damage, but SHUT UP ALREADY!  I'm actually willing to donate money to help the cause, but watching the hurricane coverage as it happened was so nauseating!  The news anchors are all retarded and fake!  

Listen, I'm a very fun, sensual, highly erotic, funny, witty and intelligent dude, but I want you to know I have a very dark morbid sarcastic and all-too realistic side which bothers and offends many people who want to see the glass as half full.  This country is in deep sh*t, there are mean narcissistic people out there, life is full of annoying frustrating setbacks, and we're all going to age and die.  And yet, I still keep on trying and hoping for the next fun and good moment to make life worth living all over again.  I'm always making a new cool friend or two or three so I still believe in people somehow right?

I'm becoming the late great George Carlin!  THE MAN HIT IT RIGHT ON THE HEAD:

Thursday, August 16, 2012


And we're back!

There is so much on my mind as of late, but I am generally in a positive mood this week.  I don't know if you know this, but I have songwriting abilities.  YES!  And I discovered this hidden talent of mine about a decade ago.  I recorded about four demos of my own songs, which I still have and I think it's high time I recorded them with better equipment.  My demos are pretty good; I believe my keyboard playing and "production" skills are not too shabby.  LOOK OUT GEORGE MARTIN, GUS DUDGEON, AND TIMBALAND!  LMAO!   Thanks to my co-worker/bud who is also very musical and plays guitar, it looks like both of us might be working together very soon!  OH MA GOD! Lyrics are the hardest thing to write, but I think after years of bombarding myself with Lennon/McCartney, John/Taupin, and Paul Simon, I think I can write a good line or two.  I've been rather dormant the past decade because of LIFE getting in the way, but I have never lost my desire to sing and have been regularly doing it at karaoke just to keep that creative spirit within me alive.  Gotta work the day job to keep paying the bills, but the time to act on my musical side may just very well be here!  I am excited, and while I am definitely not expecting worldwide fame or success from this; it'll be interesting to hear what my friend and I can come up with.  Sadly, I feel most music today fails to match the greatness of music in the past and it seems like everything has been done already, but it never hurts to try!  I've got more than adequate a voice and it's time I recorded it so that once I am dead, future generations will marvel at how such a fine talent like myself could have even existed.  LOL!  Listen man, I've been singing since I was about four years old,  My mom tells me I used to sing the Bee Gees.  Not that I'm old or anything.  COUGH!

I was a bit stoned the other night and somehow got caught up reading about the history of fast food.  HAHA!  It's absolutely amazing how earth-shattering and global this industry has become.  Americans spend something like 110 billion or more on this kind of food a year, and it has now gone global as one of our greatest exports of all time!  It's mind-blowing to learn all this really!  McDonald's, Burger King, Taco Bell, Wendy's, Subway, Pizza Hut, Carl's Jr, KFC, etc.  The list goes on and on!  As delicious and addictive as this grub can be, the modern era has revealed just how unhealthy most of this stuff is to our bodies, and many of these chains have been maligned in recent years--blamed for making America fat and for cruelty to the animals used to feed an increasingly obese nation such as ours.  It's hard to believe that at one time all these places did not even exist, but the 1950s is where the burgers and fries truly began to become mass produced.  Sometimes I think of fast food joints as eye sores on the American landscape; just try and drive on any freeway anywhere across this country and you'll always see one of these places on the side of the road.  EEK!  One of the interesting facts most people don't realize is the reason why fast food became so popular in the last fifty years or so is because more women had to leave the house to go to work, so the home-cooked meal has essentially become a thing of the past.    Interestingly enough, In-N-Out Burger, which is primarily in the Southwestern U.S. is one of the highest rated and "healthiest" of all the fast food places currently in existence for their use of very natural ingredients.  I tells ya, their burgers are really delicious!  

Damn it!  I wish I'd written this song!  From 1975:


Thursday, July 26, 2012


Last Thursday was a big BIG day!  This blog turned EIGHT years old!  WOW!  COME ON NOW!  HOW ABOUT A LITTLE COMMENT CONGRATULATING THIS LITTLE SPACE ON THE INTERNET?!  EIGHT YEARS MAN!  Not only that, but it was also my 22nd birthday!  WOOHOO!  I'm still so young and hung, and full of...LIFE!  LMAO!

Yeah so I won't mention that evil dude specifically by name who went into the movie theater and killed all those people last Friday.  Gun violence is a terrible thing folks.  And this country is world famous for breeding psychos who go postal and kill folk in one heinous rampage such as what we witnessed yet again last week!  Our laws are retarded, and where we should be strict and harsh we are not!  Now they'll spend all this money keeping this creep locked up, feeding him, giving him free health care, and having all kinds of shrinks and so-called mental health professionals studying him and trying to understand what went wrong and why he was sent over the edge as to amass such a large arsenal of weapons in his apartment and then on to killing those people at the movies.  Why did the poor baby lose it and decide to murder twelve average Americans (including a six-year old girl); how can it be prevented to never happen again?!  OH THE HORROR OF YET ANOTHER MASS SHOOTING!  Listen to me you dumbf*cks!  Stop the freakin' questions and stop the waste of taxpayer money and put the clown to death already!  THIS IS HOW YOU STOP THIS MADNESS FROM HAPPENING AGAIN!  TIME TO BE STRICT AND HEARTLESS!  I often find nowadays the victims are the ones who don't get justice whilst the criminals get all kinds of perks and special treatment!  The Norwegians are still trying to figure out and sympathize with their mass shooting creepo a year after he murdered all those teens!  REALLY?!  WHAT THE HELL?!!  FRY HIS ASS ALREADY!  FRY HIM!  TORTURE AND SEND HIM TO THE STAKE, NO FURTHER QUESTIONS!  GUILTY BEYOND A REASONABLE DOUBT RIGHT?!  UGH!  But our justice system is supposed to be the fairest and most reasonable.  Yeah okay.  YUCK!  What do I know about human rights, and do I even care?  All I know is that our time here is so very temporary and that we can be taken at any moment.   I don't understand or know why we are so vulnerable or mortal, but it's reality and all this negativity humans like to create is pointless and worthless when we're just gonna end up in an urn or coffin in the end!  You can call me a conspiracy theorist, but part of me wonders if this guy even acted alone.  Hmmm...

Ever since the Olympics came to Los Angeles in 1984, I've always been a big fan.  I mean, to see these very young people in such excellent shape doing such extraordinary things is a real treat to me.  As I grew older and began to realize my true sexual orientation, it also became pretty evident I wanted to watch the Olympics for the dudes and their hot bods.  AHAHAHAHAHA!  Let's face it, those gymnasts are very short and look stunted but they got some really nice muscular builds.  The real eye candy though, comes with the swimmers and divers.  MAMA MIA!  Those long tall sleek and perfect lean bodies are something to behold!  I sometimes regret not having trained to become an Olympian, but what poor shy Latino kid like myself do you know of that ever really makes it to the Olympic Games?  Besides, I never really learned how to swim.  I know, it's embarrassing to admit, but I had a bad near-drowning incident when I was about four that I never got over, but it's never too late to learn right?!  Hey, maybe that should be a goal for me this summer: to learn how to finally freakin' swim!  OMG!  LOLOL!  I've been saying this for years, but I will become as great as that nerd/geek Michael Phelps before I die!  Speaking of Michael, he is so damn hot!  I know he's got weird teeth and a dorky face, but I'd take him in a heartbeat!  Michael likes weed here and there, and that makes him cool in my book, but he also has the perfect swimmer's bod.  Well, the big day is tomorrow, as London hosts the 2012 Games.  WOW!  There's a city I'd love to visit as well.  Man, so much to do before I finally croak!  SO MUCH!  And by the way, those divers are often gay.  SO VERY GAY.  Like really really homosexual.  LOLOL!

Thursday, July 12, 2012


I would have never moved in here had I known!  I've got the neighbors from hell.  These people are the trashiest, most obnoxious, loudest and worthless wastes of space I've ever had the displeasure of living next to.  I've only lived here a year since I became a victim of the housing crisis, but it's been enough to make me wish for something terrible to happen to these barbarians.  My place is nice and cozy and charming, and the whole entire block here is full of pretty respectful and hard-working people who keep their homes looking pretty nice and clean.  BUT THESE NEIGHBORS?!  EEK!  These heathens are drug addicts, foul-mouthed, and have at least eight children who are all under the age of 10!  I've lost count, but I think the two sisters live in the complex with their kids and one of them has her sperm donor there, but then again both of the sisters just had babies and the kids are from different daddies and their mother is there too and their landlord lives in the back but he recently got evicted and it's just a never ending nightmare from these rats.  Yes, they're rats!  Some days are actually pretty peaceful and quiet, but those are rare.   Every day those kids are out playing and making noise.  The sisters battle each other or their respective baby daddies.  Epic cussing from everyone there, including the kids!  Every time I leave my house I walk away from that cursed dwelling and avoid them at all costs!  These savages must be on welfare, but recently someone was smart/brave enough to call Child Protective Services on them and the police to get them in trouble!  AND IT WASN'T ME BELIEVE IT OR NOT!  LMAO!  Oh, how I cannot wait for these people to be murdered!  Yes, including the children!  The kids like to talk sh*t as one walks by their place and act just as bad as their parents!  Look at the way they're being raised; what possible future can one expect from these spawns?  NONE!  All the houses on my block look nice, but theirs?! Devoid of any grass or trees and there's always trash all over the place.  It looks like something you'd find in a horror film! LOL!  As I write this, the two sisters are fighting each other and one of the babies is crying!  So when is the law going to take care of these losers?!  OH PLEASE BABY JESUS, SMITE THEM WITH ALL YOUR POWER AND GLORY, THESE DEMONIC SATAN-POSSESSED HUMANOIDS FROM HELL!  Quite frankly, they don't really ever mess with us directly, but it's the noise and disturbance they cause that makes it unbearable.  If this doesn't cease, I'll have no choice but to move; I've actually started to look for a new place.  Crossing my fingers daily they will all die during the night and peace at last will come with the next sunrise...

I wish I had as many readers and comments like I used to get back in the heyday of this blog, but I guess ever since I had my heart ripped and crushed to shreds back in 2010 + the brutal recovery and beyond, my posts have never been the same.  Some have accused me of being too negative or not moving on or focusing too much on NARCISSISM.  Yes okay, perhaps I have spent way too much time on dreary and all too-real material, but I never foresaw learning the painful, yet VALUABLE lessons I have in the past three years or so!  It has been nothing short of eye-opening my friends, and I'm afraid I'll never be the same again!  I don't wanna give up on love or people either mind you!   Because no matter what, I truly do believe that there are good humans out there still!  So ya see?  I'm not that embittered YET!  I do however recognize and am much more cautious about who to allow in my life and into my heart from now on.  ANYONE WHO DISPLAYS AWFUL RED FLAG NARCISSISTIC WARNING SIGNALS simply does not make it past a few words with me anymore.  I cannot stand abusive, controlling, or petty folk.  Gay men that are interested in tearing down others because of the way they dress or look turn me off, as do those who focus only on reality shows and stupid FAKEBOOK trivial nonsense are immediately disqualified from my life.  I want people to have a heart, a mind, and a soul!  EMPATHY!  A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOUR!  I want people to be kind, generous, and show some caring!  I want people to be smart and intelligent and can talk about art, world events, and our strange incredible existences!  I want to be enriched and my self-esteem to be lifted, not dragged down by some awful toxic person.  So often, emotionally giving people like myself miss these negative clues because we want to be tolerant or kind to others, but F*CK that.  NO MORE.  I'm not saying I've become an asshole or a jerk, but I have learned to draw more healthy boundaries.  At least I hope I have.  I'm obviously not perfect, nor will I ever be, but I am trying my best to not get steamrolled ever again by bad humans.  One will always run into sh*tty individuals at work or in public, but the trick is to not allow them to make you miserable!  Always keep calm and do not allow their toxicity to ruin your happiness!  Maybe my terrible neighbors are yet another lesson in humility?! LOL!




Great song and this video is purty neat:

Thursday, July 05, 2012

SUMMER 2012.

I just bought a new laptop!  My friend Larry was nice to help me choose a cheap, yet quite effective Toshiba!  I really needed a new one, because my old Dell was just embarrassing; speakers were blown out, the battery only lasted five minutes, my DVD player was broken, I had tons of viruses, etc.  I promise to take care of my new laptop ok?  I dropped the other one quite a few times, but it was so ridiculously heavy!  My new one is pretty light and seems more disposable (Made in China, LOL), but it will do!  I'm typing my first ever blog post on it!  As my friend back in Kentucky would say, "RIVETING."  LOLOLOLOL!

Oh kids, in two weeks I'm having yet another birthday.  MY GOD!  How time flies.  Yesterday was Independence Day, and I went to a local barbecue in the afternoon and got to hear my ghetto neighborhood turn into a war zone at night as everyone set off their illegal fireworks!  Oh brother!  At least my mom and I got to see the professional show in the distance from our front doorstep, which was actually a nice treat/surprise.  I tells ya what, it makes me very grateful sometimes to have been born in these United States.  Despite the fact I'm not rich, I have so many things to be thankful for.  This country has been a remarkable economic, technological, cultural, social, and creative marvel/force unlike anything the world has ever seen!  The opportunity to become anything you really want no matter what class you were born into has really been a wonderful ideal--the American Dream.  I don't want to get into how all this has gone down the toilet in the last decade or so and how America is now becoming a country of super rich elites where the middle class is being wiped out and all those great democratic ideals have now been torn to pieces and we have effectively pissed all over our Constitution--I'd like to think of this country as what it used to be; where everything was possible and there were seemingly no limits to one's potential.  I know that slavery was shitty and that women and gays had no rights, so for all that social/civil progress we have achieved I am happy I am living now, but I don't like the direction this once GREAT nation is going.  So much divisiveness, growing poverty, lack of jobs, corruption, greed, selfishness, and increasing crime.  Democrats and Republicans are all in bed together, yet people are still stupid enough to believe in these two parties!  Congress is full of greedy corrupt filthy rich millionaires who don't give a crap about the common working American!  We need a REVOLUTION damn it!  Those brave Founding Fathers that stood up to the English king; you won't find leaders like that anymore.  It's sad, but no one has the balls to die for the cause in these times!  We're all f*cking cowards!  Patrick Henry said it best, "Give me Liberty, or give me Death!"  Americans now are happy to take it up the rear as long as their favorite crappy reality show is on television!  UGH!  We're a nation of brainwashed dolts, seemingly unaware of how much this awesome country is now tanking!  We've become lazy and complacent.  Spoiled rotten really.

I want you to enjoy every good moment you can.  I got very sick about two weeks ago and it sucked!  Stomach flu or food poisoning, but it scared me very much, because I am never that ill.  This year has been one of spiritual awakening for me.  I am a gregarious fun loving man with a dry sarcastic cynical sense of humour, but as I grow older I have come to realize that people or substances cannot be depended on for one's emotional stability or happiness.  Happiness has to come from within really, and you must cultivate your own self-esteem and confidence.  I'm not saying there aren't good people out there, but I am saying that heartbreak and disappointment caused by others is very real and sadly all too common nowadays.  I firmly believe relationships should last a lifetime, but then again maybe I'm clingy and co-dependent?  I dunno man, but I want to believe in good friendships and true love; perhaps this is why I want my faith in God to grow?  I just don't think the universe happened by itself or that the miracle of Planet Earth and all this life just evolved!  THERE HAS TO BE A GOD!  I'll go into it more some other time, when I don't feel so plagued by random thoughts, but I will say that to believe in a Higher Power offers me a comfort I cannot find in ANY human being as of late.   Faith is powerful, and should not be taken lightly!  I am emotionally and physically vulnerable!  I NEED GOD IN MY LIFE!  A LOVING TOLERANT GOD THAT LOVES AND BELIEVES IN ME!  More on this to come...

I still love Radiohead.  They're weird and brilliantly unconventional:

Wednesday, May 30, 2012


I know.  I get it.  Children are the future.  And having kids and raising them must be so satisfying.  UGH!  PLEASE!  Listen, I truly admire and understand people who want to reproduce and raise their kids right with enough money and a good education.  BUT!  We live in such a terribly irresponsible world, full of lowlives and overbreeding maniacs who think having kids is some sort of badge of honour!  WELL NO!  I TELLS YA NO!  STOP THE F*CKING INSANITY ALREADY!  The Earth is disgustingly overpopulated!  And so many people out there are not fit to take care of themselves, let alone a child.  I'm very detached from all this since I am not sexually attracted to women and perhaps do not understand why there is a such a biological sexual need to dump yer load into a warm wet vagina and knock a woman up, but I am glad in the end I don't have to deal with this burden of bringing kids into the world.  Call me bitter or cynical, but as much as life can be uplifting and full of truly great and wonderful moments, most of life is frustrating and irritating and quite boring and mundane.  And don't sit there and pretend like it's all full of charm and happiness because it is not.  I just don't want to bring kids into this cruel fucked up mortal existence.  I can barely tolerate it myself! LOL!  And to see how the world is unfolding and the way things are going makes it an even scarier prospect!  WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!  Proud of having two, three, or four kids!  UGH!  YUCK! It's like rats or rabbits gone amok!  I keep harping on this overpopulation issue, but we are up to SEVEN BILLION humans on the planet!  THAT IS EGREGIOUS AND RIDICULOUS!  OVERTAXING AND STRAINING AN ALREADY EXASPERATED MOTHER NATURE!  People need to really think twice before having kids, and one child should really be enough in this already polluted world.  At least China has taken steps to stop this madness, but INDIA and AFRICA, and LATIN AMERICA are still churning out more humans for us to contend with.  HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!  WHEN WILL THIS ALL END?!  And what about our beloved UNITED STATES of AMERIKKKA?!  There's no true birth control here!  And people piss and moan about abortion; I say THANK GOD WE HAVE ABORTIONS!  THANK GOD!  We are overpopulated enough already in this country and it just keeps getting worse.  Our economy is in the crapper, people are getting crazier doing more sick insane violent things--this is no time to be having a litter of children!  My ghetto trash neighbors have tons of kids; these people are obviously on welfare and proud of their brats I'm sure.  Bunch of stupid wastes of space.  What future can those kids possibly have?!  The chances are slim to none.  I wish to offend no one who is reading this who believes in breeding and children, but I DON'T CARE!  I JUST DON'T!  Cats and dogs get put to sleep all the time, why are we so much better or f*cking special?!  SHUT UP!  STFU!  ENOUGH!   Thank you.  If my generation has had a hard time coping with life, what will the new generation of computer and gadget-obsessed entitled kids be like?!  YIKES!  My family believes in reproducing and boy have they done a good job, but it's gone too far!  MA GOD MAN!  That's a lot of child support!  LMAO!  Ironically,  I happen to be very nice and quite good with kids since I feel sorry for them and the imperfect existence they have inherited.  If your only legacy is to have children, then something is wrong with you.  Remember, they are NOT YOUR kids.  They are their own independent-thinking individuals, but many parents never see this.  I have heard the rich elite will be doing something about all these people in the near future.  A culling of humans perhaps through war or disease?  Hmmm...

Eric Arthur Blair, better known by his pen name George Orwell, was a brilliant English writer best remembered for his immortal books, 1984 and Animal Farm.  I read both years ago and was amazed at his very dark and REALISTIC view on life and human nature.  1984 is famous for its motto "BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU" and a bleak look at the future where all our rights are taken away and we are all ruled by an all-seeing and omniscient entity.  What is perhaps most disturbing is that Orwell's fictional book has already begun to happen in the AMERIKKKA and world of today!  FAKEBOOK and GOOGLE wanting all our personal information and storing our data like some sort of evil government databases.  The TSA doing bizarre and invasive body searches at airports.  The Constitution being trampled on and ignored.  The Federal Bank and its minions getting away with crimes that any ordinary citizen would be put in jail for.  Congress being bought off by lobbyists and politicians allowing the average taxpayer to be robbed.  I don't see this country or world heading into the right direction except into some sort of total one world government.  BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU.  You better believe it.  We are monitored and watched at every moment.  This blog, your mobile phone, your laptop, your Ipad, your retail purchases, etc. I know many think Ron Paul and Alex Jones are crazy or conspiracy theorists, but many of the things they have been bitching about for years have come to pass!  THAT IS WHAT MAKES IT SCARY!  If you believe NAZI GERMANY can never happen again, you are delusional and need to wake up.  History can always repeat itself.  We have achieved many civil rights and social progress, but that does not mean we are secure.  Things could go awry at any moment and nothing should be taken for granted.  Humans are fallible imperfect and evil creatures once they are dealing with money and power, and all I see is a bunch of crooks in charge of or country right now; the world period has some really crummy leaders!  LOL!  Keep your eyes peeled.  Observe how it all unfolds.  Vote for Romney or Obama, it truly won't matter now.

I like the Scissor Sisters.  Their new album is fun: