Monday, January 30, 2006


The beauty of our DVD age and Netflix (I can’t seem to say enough good things about it can I?) is that a lot of very old films are now digitally restored and available to view for a whole new generation. Videotapes could only go so far, and the quality of most films on tape was pretty awful. Worse still, was that a lot of old movies were not even available on tape.

Now that I’m a wee bit older, more mature hopefully, and more aware of how life works, I am trying to make an effort to watch really old movies, from Hollywood’s Golden Age. It’s like a new discovery for me, because growing up I really didn’t watch old movies, but what was current at the time. As a kid, the thought of watching anything in black and white was boring.

Well, not anymore! Just recently, I watched Bette Davis give an amazing performance in All About Eve. Heard about the film for years, but had never seen it. The film is a little outdated, but very interesting nonetheless. Even superior to that though, was my first viewing of a true classic: Sunset Blvd. Alls I can say is: WOW. Both All About Eve and Sunset Blvd. were released in 1950, but the latter is the very best out of the two for me.

Sunset Blvd. is dark, witty, creepy, disturbing, sad, and just plain entertaining. Seeing footage of Hollywood back in 1950 was utterly fascinating as I have navigated those very streets they mention in the movie dozens of times. William Holden was a very handsome man and a fine actor in this film, and Gloria Swanson as the troubled has-been actress Norma Desmond is nothing short of perfect in her role. I really really enjoyed this film, seeing it for the very first time fifty-six years later after its release. A biting, scathing, and tragic look at how the industry itself destroys the very people it helps to become stars from a brilliant director, Billy Wilder.

I shall be watching more and more of these old films as soon as I can get them. What strikes me most is that as wholesome as they say times were before the 1960's cultural revolution, Hollywood was already tackling some very serious dark issues in its movies way before.

I’m impressed to say the least, and while our movies today are much more realistic and technically superior, the old stuff is just as compelling and the beauty of these old pieces of celluloid lies in the attention given to the scripts. And who can forget that they are also laced with our glorious actors and actresses from yesteryear.

Lights! Camera! Action!

Hooray for Hollywood indeed.

Saturday, January 28, 2006


I hate being mortal and having to die one day for sure only because I do enjoy living tremendously, despite life’s pitfalls.

Aside from my appreciation for nature, animals, physical beauty, love, sex, food, film, music, laughter, or spending time with someone special, I think the one thing I find most amazing about life itself is learning.

LEARNING. I have always loved learning, and I continue to learn, not just from life’s experiences, but from all the facts that one can find out there. I guess that's why I enjoyed school so much and I miss college. I will go back...someday I hope.

The wealth of information is astonishing. That used to be confined to books really, which I have always loved, but with the Internet...WOW! Yes, aside from hours of viewing porn (LOL), I can also spend them constructively online enriching my noggin.

I love digging into famous people’s lives, and reading their biographies. I find it fascinating to learn about people who have already lived and either contributed something to the world or did nothing but help make it worse. Each life story is compelling, regardless.

Learning and being informed on current events like politics is something else I love. The political situation in the Middle East, the role of the United States as a great superpower, terrorism, and other issues are very very invigorating to my brain.

Religion too (although I hate how fundamentalistic it has become) is also a very interesting topic to make cerebral juices flow. Why do people so adhere to their beliefs, and why do wars continue to be waged due to them?

Death is another topic I am very drawn to. Why do we live a certain amount of time, slowly wither, get ill, then kick the bucket? What truly happens to us once we go?

Movie trivia is another one of my favorite things to learn about. Everything related to how a movie was filmed, what actors were in it, the director, producer, awards it may have won, critical reviews and such make for endless hours of intense and involved learning. Watching movies on DVD is very educational.

Other cultures and languages, historical events, authors, books, essays, atlases, almanacs, name it. Thank you Wikipedia, PBS, Netflix, IMDB, Amazon, other people’s blogs, news websites, etc. for enriching my life with all this gorgeous treasure of info.

I truly will never cease to enjoy learning. Until the day I die.

I wish I had more time.


Wednesday, January 25, 2006


I really did not get into American Idol until after the second season really, and while it’s great to see superstar talent like Kelly Clarkson come out of all of this, it’s the initial auditions that make the show for me.

The initial coast to coast auditions are just plain ridiculously hilarious! Simon Cowell, supreme asshole that he is, is remarkably funny in his directness towards bad or awful singers. Add the authentic British accent, and you’ve got the recipe for why the show is a tremendous success.

The latest season is no exception--the ratings prove the show is doing very well once again, and as Howard Stern and crew have rightfully stated, it’s Simon who makes the show. No question.

"You ah the whust singa I have eva hud."

"Yo singing is apole-ing."

"That was absolutely towchoous."

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL! Ah Simon. And this season, he has been especially vicious towards the questionably gay or obviously overweight, prompting certain groups to protest and many articles on the show’s current mean streak.

I dunno, I myself find it funny, only because those auditioning put themselves in the situation to be ridiculed by claiming to be great and having an ego the size of Alaska. The really good or great singer is humble, no matter what they look or act like, and in turn, they aren’t mocked.

Last night’s episode was a riot, especially that preposterous skanky black girl with the major attitude going off after being correctly rejected. Ronetta was her name? AHAHAHAHAHA!

I haven’t yet watched tonight’s episode. I don’t TIVO, so I still had to use that outdated thing: the VCR.

Monday, January 23, 2006


Aw man. This is bad, bad, bad, bad.

Ford cutting all these jobs and closing plants is not a good thing at all. For the employees, and for our country’s economy in general. Let’s face it, we are not the industrial giant we once used to be, and that is kinda sad and scary at times.

I mean, I own a Toyota myself only because they’re damn good reliable and gas-friendly/conscious little vehicles! Ta hell with an American car man, they have a really bad reputation at this point! Gas guzzling clunkers is what most of us see them as.

And to think, at one point, American cars were the envy of the whole world! The pride and joy of this country! All of our products were! Now where is all our stuff made? China, Taiwan, and anywhere else there’s cheap labor! It’s really quite shocking! Nothing is made in America anymore! What gives man?!

All this outsourcing really gets on my nerves. Last year, when I bought my Dell computer, I encountered some problems getting it correctly delivered, and instead of speaking to a representative in the States, I had to deal with people in India and the Philippines! I hate to be prejudiced, but dealing with those people and their accents halfway around the world really offended and insulted me as a customer.

And yet, our economy is still the world’s largest, most diverse, and technologically advanced. How is that, with everything being made and outsourced to other places?

Is this what they mean by us becoming a service economy?

Thursday, January 19, 2006


I have some sort of head cold/allergy and it’s annoying me.

A few weeks ago, I sat down and watched a very interesting movie about Adolf Hitler’s final days in his underground bunker before he, along with his longtime girlfriend then wife Eva Braun committed suicide. BLOODY COWARDS is what they were, seeing that they had lost the war and were going to face criminal prosecution and execution no doubt for their bloody awful crimes.

The film, called Downfall, had its moments, although at times I felt it went too darn slow, but it was effective in its portrayal of a man who nearly conquered the world, but in the end thankfully saw his demented psychotic ideas go to hell. The suicide of others surrounding Hitler like Goebbels and his wife and other Nazi high-ranking officials is pretty compelling as well.

What troubled me more in the film was that while Hitler actually seems human for about three seconds filled with fear and concern that his sick world domination plan is coming to an end, Eva Braun (his wife) shows hardly any concern or care in the world. Was she truly this clueless?

Let’s face it. For better or for worse (in this case worse) Adolf Hitler made an indelible mark on history. He was a shrewd skillful intelligent man, who managed to brainwash millions into adoring him and believing in him. I mean, we still talk about this madman today! Just the mere mention of his name arouses all kinds of opinions and sentiments from people.

Talk about making your mark on history! Hitler accomplished this, despite his negative behavior. Because of the Nazi regime, many industries in Germany and other technological ideas are still in use to this day! The Nazis, as evil as they were, actually accomplished some remarkable things.

Unfortunately, their atrocious deeds outweigh any constructive ideas they may have contributed to. The systematic murder of millions of Jews, Gypsies, mentally ill/handicapped, and gays is something for which Hitler and crew are unforgivable.

It’s too bad. The guy had potential to truly be a positive charismatic leader. And he sure was. With an appalling dark side that will never be forgotten.

Yes, you can change/alter the course of history negatively.

But why would you want to?

Tuesday, January 17, 2006


The Golden Globe Awards were kinda boring last night, except for the fact that I watched them with some very funny gay friends.

I was happy to see Brokeback Mountain awarded for best film, screenplay, director, and song. However, I was kinda disappointed Heath Ledger did not win in the acting category and lost to Philip Seymour Hoffman who is a great actor himself. This sux because most gay men want to sleep with Ledger! LOL! How superficial!

Felicity Huffman was justly awarded for Transamerica and that was great to see as she does deserve it. Her role as a pre-op transsexual is mind-blowingly good.

The awards for television shows such as Lost and Desperate Housewives didn’t excite me much as I really don’t watch these programs. I really don’t watch regular TV at all anymore period. Maybe I’ll check these shows out sometime on DVD through Netflix or something.

And so Hollywood looks next to the Oscars.

I really thought Heath Ledger was a sure lock, but now Hoffman or Joaquin Phoenix look like the true winners of the Oscar itself.

We’ll see...

Sunday, January 15, 2006


Let’s see. Codes/usernames/passwords I gotta remember:

–My ATM debit card secret code.

–My username/password for one program at work.

–Code/password for another program at work.

–Username/password for work email.

–Username/password for work Internet access.

–Password to log on to home computer.

–Username/password for four different email accounts on the regular Internet.

–Username/password for this blog.

–Username/password for the photo upload program I use for this blog.

–Username/password for the audio upload program I use for this blog.

–Secret code I use for the phone service for this blog.

–Email/password for my new subscription to Netflix.

–Email/password for

–Username/password for four different adult-themed websites I visit (ahem).

–Email/password for

I know I’ve missed others, but it’s just way too much for Christ’s sake! I wonder how it is I haven’t gone crazy! I try and use the same ones for many of the above, but still man! STILL!!!

I really hope I never get Alzheimer’s.

Saturday, January 14, 2006


I barely became a member of Netflix two weeks ago or so to ring in the new year, and so far I am loving this service! Whoever created this is a genius business entrepreneur who is probably now worth millions.

It’s really freakin’ cool! I’ve chosen a shitload of movies already to view--way more than I will get shipped to my home in a month and sit down and make time for to even watch, but it’s still purty awesome. I think I’ve got a whole year or so already covered!!!

How did I not sign up sooner man? Driving to Blockbuster, wasting time there looking for a film, not always finding what u want (especially their decent but still sorely lacking foreign film section) and spending all that money there is a hassle! On Netflix, the movies are amazingly presented, reviewed, explained, and navigating through the site is a breeze. The film selection is astounding. If other friends of yours are part of the service, u can share your movie lists and recommend films to each other and all kinds of neat stuff.

Thank you Internet. With Netflix, my life has now become truly more convenient as I am an avid movie buff.

Why read the book when you can watch the film?

Wednesday, January 11, 2006



This morning., my co-worker and I William, were being a little too loud laughing it up about the usual crude sex talk we usually have. All in good fun.

But, I was reported to my supervisor for disturbing the peace.

Bullshit. Yes, I was probably guilty of laffing it up a bit wee loud, but come on! Everyone here is guilty of talking, chitchatting, and laffing it up and I never ever complain!

Why try and ruin my party? Sometimes I wonder if it isn’t just envy. Lots of these women and men are married, frustrated, and have kids and crap. Is it their daily frustrations that has them f**kin’ picking on me?

I dunno. Words were exchanged, and at one point I got very upset and started cursing real bad at this one Russian/Armeynian PUTA I got into it with. I’m not proud of myself when I get that angry, but JAYSUS MAN, I am human and it just upsets me when people are hypocrites about this kinda sh*t.

If this were a library and I were the only jackass stirring up trouble, I would understand. But I’m not.

The Armeyneeans get together constantly to speak in their language, live it and laugh it up quite good, and I never ever bitch at them.

But I did today.


I’m so much better than this. I really am…what is a talented scrub like myself still doing here???


Monday, January 09, 2006


How neat is this?

Howard Stern, my favorite morning crude vulgar psycho debuted finally on Sirius Satellite Radio this very morning. It was kind of weird hearing him on paid radio for the first time actually. He does curse more, and I’m sure he will still keep the show as edgy as always without the freakin’ FCC on his back anymore.

Trying to set up for Sirius Radio was a battle though. I waited till the very last minute, till yesterday to look for a receiver. I don’t know how many Best Buys, Circuit Cities, and Targets I went to, but I finally got this one. I had no such luck finding the home kit though, so I had to order it on Apparently, Sirius Satellite Radio does not work like regular radio, you have to get all kinds of attachments/accessories to be complete. It’s a way to make money of course. And installing and setting the whole thing up takes a bit of time and can be a hassle.

So for now, I got the thing hooked up in my car, which is better than nothing. In about two weeks, my backordered home kit should arrive and I can finally listen to it at home, or at work.

That is, if the antenna is strong enough to get reception at work. At least they re-broadcast the Stern show at nights in case I miss it in the morning.

This is strange way cool technology in its very infancy.

Saturday, January 07, 2006


I have seen an astonishingly amazing film last night, Transamerica.


Felicity Huffman from Desperate Housewives, gives one hell of a performance and Kevin Zegers is one hot fuckin’ dude. I remember good ole’ Kev from the Dawn of the Dead remake. Mmmmmm...

Funny and touching, this is one film surprise I am glad to have seen. I almost did not make it, but my co-workers convinced me to go last night, and I am so glad to have caught this witty poignant movie.

An Oscar for Ms. Huffman please. She's that good.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Wednesday, January 04, 2006


I went to the family viewing/wake yesterday. I felt so out of place after not seeing most of these people (extended family and friends) in years and years. And it certainly isn’t comfortable being my age and still not married, whilst most of them are and have kids up the wazoo. No offense, I know us homos come from heterosexuals of course, but sometimes I resent straight people. There they were, a bunch of my half brothers and sisters and cousins sharing their kids’ pics. I felt lonely really.

I resent them being so closed-minded at times. So judgmental. So unforgiving. So proud of their marriages and kids. I know it’s not easy being human period, but it’s so much harder being gay. It sucks sometimes. Why must everyone get married and have kids? Is it some God damn rule that everyone has to follow? I resent this very much. Why do others care so much about my or then again, anyone else’s personal life? Why must they be aware of to whom I’m giving my penis to??!!!

I know it sounds crude, but that’s what people always wanna know. Whom you’re schtooping. SICK REALLY.

I oughtta just hold a coming out party one day and invite all these extended family bastards and just blurt it out one day, "Hey, I’m gay, and y’all either accept me or EF OFF."

They all suspect or pretty much know I’m sure, but it doesn’t stop me from feeling very out of place amongst them.

I wonder if anyone else knows what I’m talking about?

Monday, January 02, 2006



I did nothing but lounge around today and watch tha Rose Parade. It rained and rained and rained and I felt so bad for the marching bands and people that had to go down the five-mile route, but they were all excellent sports and put on the best show.

Back to work tomorrow and I have to go to my half sister’s wake in the evening. I hate reality, but I must confront it and see lots of relatives and people I have not encountered in many many years. It’s gonna be weird. Real weird.

Are we to believe what these people are forecasting/predicting for 2006? Particularly of concern is possible massive quakes in San Francisco. GULP!

Very very interesting and worth the read:

Sunday, January 01, 2006


Oh my God! A whole brand spankin’ new year! Hello 2006!

Seems like just yesterday Cleetus, we weres alls worried about the millennium, the year 2000, Y2K, and now look at how far into the decade we are! HOT DIGGITY DAMN!

So I did a little champagne last night at the Madrid Theater where they had a decent Beatles tribute show to ring in the new year, complete with party favors and such. The guy who plays Ringo was absolutely dead on and his drumming was first rate. I was most impressed with him actually. Who knew?!

The Rose Parade interestingly, isn’t until tomorrow morning this year. And it might freakin’ rain! EEK!