Friday, December 30, 2005


Well, the year is about to close. I feel much better today I guess over the recent tragedy in my family. Going to the gym yesterday afternoon certainly helped and I’m hoping to make time to go again today. Nothing beats exercise to clear the mind, soothe the soul, and tire out the body. All this while still giving me a renewed sense of hope that it will all be okay and that this is just another test. Life’s full of them. I am so appreciative of every little moment now.

So let’s think HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY! Because despite it all, life’s wonderful! It’s a gift! Hell yeah! I had planned to leave to Las Vegas tonight to ring in 2006, but I did not want to deal with traffic to and fro. Someone told me it could be up to ten hours on the road both ways! EF THAT! And I had my hotel room reserved and all, which wasn’t going to be cheap, but alas not a bad deal for this time of year. And the flights at this stage in the game are horribly expensive.

Oh well. Vegas’ll still be there next year...barring any terrorist attack God forbid. So I’ll just go next month or something, when it’s less crowded.

I’ll be in Los Angeles for the first time in years on New Year’s Eve. For two years in a row, I spent it in New Orleans, and boy oh boy was that a blast.

Forward march my friends. I thank you all for your kind words offering condolences.

I’ll try and find a party for tomorrow night and get my alcohol on.

And I offer you this song, as one of my favorite and most inspirational of 2005:

God bless.

Thursday, December 29, 2005


Well, at about 10:30p.m. last night, my half sister of only 44 years of age passed away. I am, to say the least, very sad but not surprised over the news, and especially feel terrible for her mother, her immediate brothers, sister, her children, and her husband. How bloody awful. Cancer is a terrible evil heinous murderer.

My relationship with her was extremely distant, but it affects me nonetheless, for we did have the bond of having the same father. And so, she has taken that final jump/leap/step towards the "other side." What in God's good name is over there anyway? I dunno, but I'm hoping it's a long while before I ever freakin' find out! UGH MAN! I wonder what she's doing right now? Is Cecilia meeting up with Dad and other deceased loved ones? Are they now looking at us here in this dimension? Do they talk to each other there? Hug? Enjoy neverending happiness now that world pressures are done with and they no longer have to worry about a physical body?

Or perhaps there is nothing, and that's just it. We all just die and the lights go out for good. I'd rather think, hope, and pray that Cecilia has gone to a beautiful place, and that all of us who deserve it, will go there too.

As for now, alls I can say kids is, make the most out of every little minute you have. Whether you're stressed, tired, upset, happy, bored, busy, stuck in traffic, angry, joyful, or whatever---enjoy it. This is one short ride apparently. Forgive those who screw you over and let stupid shit go. It's all so trivial and meaningless in the grand scheme of things.

It really truly is.

Tuesday, December 27, 2005


Well my Xmas was mediocre, only because what had been feared is almost a reality. My father’s (R.I.P.) oldest child is in the hospital, dying of cancer. I haven’t seen her in over ten years, and never really kept in touch with her but it still sucks, because after all, she is my half sister. She’s got lots of kids (some adopted) and has been an exceptional housewife all this time, battling this disease on and off for the past seven years. And she's only about 43 years old or so.

It started I think as some sort of neck tumor, then to the breast, and well…why get gruesome with all the details? It’s like a heavy gray cloud hanging over all of us right now, especially her immediate family and brothers and sister. These would be my dad’s first kids with his first wife. I’m depressed over this, they must be devastated.

Only a miracle now would save her. But unfortunately I do expect to be at a wake or funeral sometime soon.


It’s a fact kids. We gotta die. And now it’s her time.

Enjoy this journey as much as possible.

Friday, December 23, 2005


Christmas Time Is Here Again! (1967)

Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again

Aint been round since you know when
Christmas time is here again
O-U-T spells "out"

Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again

Aint been round since you know when
Christmas time is here again
O-U-T spells "out"

Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again

Aint been round since you know when
Christmas time ... [music continues and fades to background]

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Wednesday, December 21, 2005


Well congratulations to Reginald Dwight, better known to the world as Sir Elton John! The piano-playing extravagant entertainer got married to his longtime boyfriend, some David Furnish he’s been with for quite a few years. Didn’t they just make gay marriage in England legal? Or is it just a union/partnership thing?

I dunno frankly. It’s hard to keep up, but only a few countries (that can be counted on one hand) have made
homo union legal. The rest of the world thinks gays and lesbians are perverted family-destroying sodomite degenerate devils! WELL GOLLY!

I’m glad for Elton and proud of all that genuinely open-mindedly support this. I think it’s a step in the right direction. I would much rather have gay men with other gay men, than run the risk of having a guy who is trying to repress it all and marry a poor unsuspecting naïve woman (er, Brokeback Mtn. par exemple). Now that’s awful! Society trying to convert a hardcore gay man is stupid and destructive to the individual and his family. Worse yet are all those poor dudes who go into the priesthood. UGH.

As for Elton, he’s a phenomenal songwriter with the hot-blooded temper of a diva. Cheers to his
marriage and may all the haters pass out and die from heart attacks/strokes at this "disgusting family-threatening act."

Tuesday, December 20, 2005


There once was this child, a mere 5 years old or so the first time he realized that he was perhaps different. He was a little more of a sissy than usual, and clung to the only parental figure he ever really could depend on: his beloved mother. Then his older brother and grandmother suddenly came to America able to finally escape a deadly civil war, and came to live with this delicate child.

The older brother began teasing him and exposing him as nothing but a mama’s boy. The barely present tyrannical father figure would do nothing but yell and scream when he pleased. The child’s older half brothers would from time to time visit and also tease this boy.

As the boy grew and grew and saw the severe dysfunction that was his family, he turned towards himself and began to discover stronger feelings towards the same sex. He did not know why, but he knew it felt good to think of boys every time he masturbated, starting at a very early age 11. As he grew older, the feelings of shame and guilt increased, as did his attraction. Hatred and mocking of homosexuality was everywhere: at home, school, and in the media. He felt lost, alone, scared, and like a real failure.

Then one day, the now lanky, tall budding young man at age 15 ran into a story about a gay teenager who was so afraid of his sexual orientation, that he killed himself. Inspired by this tragedy, the adolescent decided it was time to admit to himself and to God that this was his nature, to not question it, nor to be ashamed or afraid. No, he was not going to go to hell, nor was he a horrible human being for having these desires.

He finally had his first intense sexual experience with another man at age 18, then decided to soul search some more for the next five years and remain celibate until he was ready to fall in love at age 23 with a wonderful young man, in his first and only real romantic relationship, which didn’t quite work out the way he had planned and has turned him into a cynic regarding love. But he is glad that at least he got to experience it.

Alas, due to many circumstances in life, this older young man still struggles with others accepting him, and cannot understand why people would still have a problem with his homosexuality, but so be it. He has tried his best to love himself and not give a damn about what anybody else says or thinks.

This, semi-briefly is my story. It hasn’t been easy, but here I am.

Monday, December 19, 2005


O.k. I’m still dentally sensitive, but one final chopper is causing me the most pain. This is good news, because it means the other teeth are responding well to the gel my PILIPINA dentizt gave me.

I sawr KING KONG! Oh my! This movie had me balling. Naomi Watts is emotionally moving in her role and the special effects are first-rate! Thrilling! Exciting! Non-stop action and emotion! Bravo to the cast and crew, even though the first part of the movie is a little too long in my opinion. But yeah, so I cried like four times during the whole film, literally with tears streaming down my face to see what a gentle soul King Dong is, and how evil and exploitative humanity can be. One sole good woman can see how good this oversized gorilla is, yet everyone else treats him like an evil terrorist savage. How utterly sad. Animal abuse wrenches my heart and soul, and this film did it alright. HOLY COW DID IT EVA! And not as big a box office hit as expected this opening weekend, but word-of-mouth might just redeem it.

And lemme tells ya, I’ve always known Dave Chappelle is funny from his cable show and the hilarious Undercover Brother film (a movie he nearly steals), but Saturday night I caught one of his stand-up shows filmed back in 2004, and this guy is an entertaining comic genius. He really had me laffing. Genuinely laffing. Way ta go!

More gifts to buy and lots to do this week. Onward!

Saturday, December 17, 2005


I finally saw that BROKEHISBACK MOUNTINGHIM film last night.

I don’t wanna give too much away for those who haven’t seen it, other than to say that it is one of the most tragic films I think I have ever experienced. Reminded me a lot of Far From Heaven, another wonderful film similar to this. Emotionally devastating and beautifully filmed. The scenes of the Wyoming countryside are gorgeous, and director Ang Lee is very skillful in bringing out the very best emotionally out of his actors.

All of them give tremendous performances, but handsome Heath Ledger in particular is amazing. A lonely, repressed good man trying to live his life in a cruel demanding world. DAYAM BOY! YOU GO HEATH! IMMA ROOT FOR YOU AT OSKAR TIME! And Jakey G? Hot damn that boy is so cute and adorable. You lube it up just right so it can go smoothly in...they make a great couple. They really f**kin’ do.

None of the sex/intimate scenes are disgusting or gross, they are done in very good taste, and to dem naysayers that have been offended, I SAY Y’ALL NEED TO GROW UP AND GET OVER IT. So they do a little backdooring. Whatever. And yet, people can still be pretty cruel and insulting. This film opens our eyes to the reality of societal/internal pressures and horrible shame instilled within us all about homosexuality. To miss this essential point, is to be a real DOOFUS.

It’s so sad really. So very sad.

I didn’t cry like some people in the theater, but I did feel like I needed a noose, a gun, or some Prozac after viewing it. Heavy, heavy, heavy.

And oh yeah, eight dollars for parking here? Nice place, but EF YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!

Highway robbery!

Wednesday, December 14, 2005


 the pain has moved from my upper jaw to my lower jaw. Weird. But I'm holding out hope it'll subside soon, right before I take an anvil and drop it on my dentist's head. But I digress...

I've liked classical music since I was a kid, and for some reason, Xmastime always brings out my desire to listen to it. I mean, it really is beautiful music to behold. So soothing. Relaxing. And it probably makes one smarter too! Last night, I spent it downloading some stuff onto my IPOD from immortals such as Ludwig Van Beethoven, Mozart, Bach, and some Italian composers too.

By the way, two fantastic films (embellished for dramatic effect) on the most famous classical composers of all time would be Immortal Beloved and Amadeus. Very entertaining, and well made. F. Murray Abraham and Tom Hulce are wonderful as Salieri and Mozart and Gary Oldman (always a brilliant actor) is phenomenal as Beethoven. If you have not seen these films, time to get the DVDs! PRONTO! Fantasia, the 1940 Disney cartoon is also pretty cool. That they were able to beautifully animate already existing classical musical compositions is pretty awesome.

How did these composers think up these melodies and write them for all kinds of instruments in an orchestra?! It's mind-boggling! Note for note man! That shit takes work and true admiration! The music can be just plain gorgeous!

And here we are, hundreds of years later, still listening to the work these people left behind, when they are now dead and gone...

Life's weird like that.

So take a listen to this gorgeous piece, by Wolfang Amadeus Mozart. A genius that only lived till age 35:

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Tuesday, December 13, 2005


-------------------------------------I think my sensitive teeth are getting better with the special gel my dentist gave me. I think. Crossing mee fingers...

But focusing on something more entertaining, how about BAREBACK MOUNTHIM? Looks like it did very well this morning at the Golden Globe nominations. That oughtta frighten and disgust the religious right huh? Gay-themed films did very well overall, signaling Hollywood’s slow but sure acceptance that homosexuality is not to be feared or despised like serial killers or terrorism, but embraced and depicted as a very integral and normal part of all of our lives.

And I’m not just saying this because I’m part of the rainbow pride team, even if I wasn’t, my workplace alone is proof that these people exist and are contributing members of our society. They’re with us at work, in our social lives, and in our families. SO EF YOU YE CONSERVATIVE A-HOLES. Love thy brother and sister o.k? Regardless of whom they decide to pork in bed. Jesus man!

Mind you, Brokeback Mountain was only showing at one theater here in L.A. this past weekend, and it was completely sold out thanks to the other fags dying to see dem cowboys getting it on. I tried to go, but could not get a ticket. It should get better as it opens in more theaters this coming weekend.

Ah, but the big, and I mean BIG release this week is none other than KING KONG. Wow. The reviews this film is getting are astoundingly good and it probably is going to be a massive box office hit a la Titanic back in 1997/1998. It’s the perfect Hollywood film. A damsel in distress, a big special effects creature, a city in chaos...what more do ya need? I’m a big fan of the original 1933 version, and hoping this already known story will have only improved under this magnificent director, Peter Jackson.

As expensive as it has become to go to the movies, PLEASE GO YE faithful blogger! Support good ole’-fashioned entertainment!

That’s the beauty and greatness of our phenomenal country! Well, with significant contributions from the Aussies, Brits, and New Zealanders of course too!

Monday, December 12, 2005


A little over a week ago, my dentist (whom up to this point I had loved and have had for the past ten years or so) performed some small fillings on two of my teeth on the right side of my mouth. I had to go back on Friday complaining about pain still and she gave me a special fluoride gel that I am to use because upon testing my teeth, she said that unfortunately I was going through massive sensitivity.

Jesus Christ man! Not even having my wisdom teeth removed a few years back was this painful! It gets bad when I drink something cold, and sometimes there’ll be this lingering throbbing pain out of the blue. I hate it! It’s bloody awful. Maybe that’s why I found
The Chronicles of Narnia pretty mediocre Saturday night at the movies, because I got this pain I’m still dealing with in my piehole. I pray and hope that within the next few days the special gel will relieve the sensitivity and I don’t need fillings redone or God forbid a root canal which I hear can be very painful.

Yes, it could be worse right? Kidney stones, earache, giving birth, or a swift kick in the balls could all be causing me worse pain, but if you’ve ever had a toothache, it’s enough to drive you mad.

If indeed I need further dental work, I might just take that nasty drill and take it to my dentist’s head and kill the bitch.

Saturday, December 10, 2005


Good God. I can't believe I'm dedicating a post to one of pop culture's most hated oogly as hell women: Yoko Ono. Frankly, after all I've read about her and the things she's done and said, she has been quite the bitch. I don't blame her for breaking up The Beatles as so many have claimed, but she was most certainly instrumental in creating an even bigger rift between John and Paul. And frankly, I know Paul McCartney and her dislike each other.

However, John was most definitely madly in love with her. And if this is what made him happy in the last years of his life, then so be it. She too loved John, and to have witnessed him murdered in cold blood before her very eyes really must have been devastating. That just plain sucks. I applaud her though for staring coldly and not saying a word to Lennon's killer as he sat in the back of the police car immediately after the horrible crime. That asshole has said the image of Yoko just staring at him blankly like that has haunted him till this day. GOOD!

What if Yoko had been shot instead? What a horrible thought, but at least we'd have John! I know, I'm a selfish mean bastard.

And good God, how would John have handled his muse getting killed?,2933,178072,00.html

Wednesday, December 07, 2005


It breaks your heart:

"I've always felt that animals are the purest spirits in the world. They don't fake or hide their feelings, and they are the most loyal creatures on Earth. And somehow we humans think we're smarter - what a joke. " -Pink

Tuesday, December 06, 2005


Well, not to be Debbie Downer, but I worry. Iran is now only a few months away from having a viable nuclear weapon. How awfully dangerous for the region, especially Israel of course.

60 some years ago, the United States beat the Nazis thankfully, and developed the atomic bomb before Hitler could ever get his grimy hands on one. The Japanese were taught a lesson by having two of their cities obliterated, and the greatest most horrifying war in human history was mercifully ended. But all of this incredible power the U.S. possessed came with a huge price. The Soviets followed, and now the chickens have come home to roost. Countries that many feel are too dangerous to own a nuclear weapon, now do and are in a race to get a hold of one, including the beloved Iranian government. What monster did we create? What door did we open? A very dangerous one, where now we are in danger of getting attacked by terrorists and where enemy countries of Israel might just use one against them to appease their hatred.

Einstein, a major contributor to the development of nuclear weapons later regretted encouraging the creation of such a destructive force, which we will probably see used again in our lifetimes.

Perish the thought.

Monday, December 05, 2005


-----------------------------------------I better not get too excited, but two upcoming movie releases this month are bona fide blockbusters. Well, at least King Kong is. Brokeback Mountain might suffer from a still very closed-minded American public. Or it just might benefit from all the controversy of the very gay issue it tackles. We'll just have to wait and see!

I for one, cannot wait for both these films, although the CGI used for the gorilla in the trailers I've seen so far does not look convincing enough for me. I hope I'm wrong. And to see Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger as cowboy lovers? MINDBLOWINGLY F**KIN' HOT!

Jesus Marimba! Imma gonna cum in mee pants at this rate...,,14936-1904842,00.html

Thursday, December 01, 2005


Sir Paul McCartney. The Staples Center in Downtown L.A. last night. A concert I've been waiting and wanting to go to for years finally came true. What can I say? Lots.

--I almost cried (how gay!) when the curtain went up, it felt so surreal to even be there, seeing this 63 year-old legend in top form. Deep down inside, I wanted a surprise visit from Ringo, and was deeply missing George and John.

--Great seat, except for the bloated shit brickhouse dude to my right I had to keep elbowing for possession of my space! But I kept winning! HA!

--Great band, nice guys, and a very funny lovable drummer

--Beautiful lights, background images, and pyrotechnics man! Live and Let Die never sounded so f**kin' awesome! BOOM!

--Awesome renditions of Let Me Roll It, I'll Follow The Sun, In Spite Of All The Danger, For No One, Too Many People/She Came In Through The Bathroom Window, Helter Skelter and I've Got A Feeling. These are obscure songs to the casual fan, but to a hardcorer like me, I enjoyed these the most.

--Front row fans and their funny as hell signs. LOL! "Remember me Paul back in '65 at Shea Stadium?"

--Paul is very witty, and connects well with the audience, and his signature move is to raise that bass/guitar over his head every chance he gets.

--I don't know if it was the lighting, heavy make-up, or plastic surgery, but he looked phenomenal and his skilled ability with all sorts of musical instruments is impressive when seen and heard live.

We can only hope this isn't the last time he'll tour, but the reality is, Paul is not getting any younger. But at least I got to see him, which leaves me very giddily satisfied.

And here's the setlist:

Wednesday, November 30, 2005


To say I am in heaven would be an understatement. I, at the very last minute here, was able to get one ticket online to an amazing seat to tonight's final Paul McCartney concert show here in L.A. at the Staples Center! WOW! I CANNOT WAIT! A LIVING BREATHING BEATLE! ON STAGE! OMG! AM I DREAMING??!!

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Tuesday, November 29, 2005


George Harrison died four years ago today here in Los Angeles. Always in the shadow of the enormous Lennon/McCartney songwriting team, but in the end Harrison proved his worth as an amazing contributor to The Beatles, he is sorely missed, and I certainly thank him for some great f**kin' songs he wrote not just for the group but as a solo artist as well. Wherever you are man, know that your short time on this Earth was incredible and that you will never be forgotten.

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Monday, November 28, 2005


Yes, I have been very sad recently, due to many circumstances--I'm probably suffering from actual clinical depression, but...

Instead of focusing on what is making me down, sad, and feel wretched, I wanna say that there is lots I am grateful for and that all this negativity that permeates me as of late is nothing but a stupid fake veil trying to ruin my usual positive nature. I could sit here and write about what makes me mad, sad, angry, frustrated, anxious, and just plain depressed, but EF IT!

NO NO NO!!! I'll pretend I'm accepting a great glorious award and this is my acceptance speech, because I am overwhelmingly happy:

--I love you mom, you are always nagging me, but you are one beautiful strong amazing survivor. I admire you and thank you for your genuine love.

--My cousin, my brother, my aunt, you guys are there, not as often as I'd like and maybe with your faults (dear brother...AHEM!), but overall I do love thee.

--My friends, who offer me genuine laffs and make me forget my problems.

--La Luna Negra, whom I've known for years and deep down inside cares for my well-being and whom I always hold dear to my heart for being a good soul, despite your filthy little mouth! HEEHEE!

--Loren Soth, you mean so much to me, and am honored to know you now and forever.

--For my humble shelter, car, food, and yeah even that f**kin' job. Yes, even you JOB, for at least you help me pay my bills and provide me with the things I need to survive, something so many out there do not have.

--To music, painting, sculpture, film, and all the artists who bring me joy with such beautiful creations.

--For having decent looks and not being dumb, but actually kinda smart and aware. And I do mean this most humbly.

--To ye fellow bloggers who actually make time to read this thing, your loyalty is very much appreciated and comments are always welcome. I know there are good people in this world, despite all the evil, and we can and do make a difference. Corny, but true!

--To nature/animals, what a joy and privilege to share this planet with doggies, cats, dolphins, plants and all other kinds of neat creatures.

--For being in the greatest country in the world, despite your flaws, you are one great place America.

--Last but never least, to God, yes I do believe in you Lord. I'm sorry I'm not a better Christian, but I hate the crazies who claim to follow you and judge others. But I'm not supposed to focus on the negative so I'll say thanks for upholding me when I am at my most messed up, and I love you because I know you are there, even when I think you're not. I love and cherish your many blessings and pray and hope for nothing but the best for me and the truly kind folk out there.

There! I think I actually do feel better. Really!

Saturday, November 26, 2005


Congratulations to Madonna. I don't know how this bitch does it, but she just does. She has just tied Elvis Presley for most top ten hits ever by any artist, and her album Confessions On A Dance Floor has hit #1 on Billboard. At 47 years of age, and 22 years or so of being in showbiz, this is one determined fierce woman. And yes, I've listened to the album, and it is quite good.

Je suis desolée...

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She has her fair share of detractors though. She can be quite the uppity pretentious little witch. Read on:

Friday, November 25, 2005


My cousin and I, November 24, 2005.


Yeah, he's my brother's roommate, they bought a townhouse together a few years back and this little oogly as hell balding sh*t has the nerve to come to my house yesterday evening for Thanksgiving and would not stop with the gay jokes/innuendos directed towards me. They weren't just jokes anymore, but personal attacks. How freakin' disrespectful! I had to tell him, "You need to stop these jokes right now because I'm f**kin' getting pissed off." He laughed it off, thinking I was joking, but I very sternly pulled his chair back, looked him straight in the eyes and fiercely said, "No, I'm serious, stop it, it's not funny anymore." To which he had no choice but to back off seeing me as pissed off as I was. All my brother could do was hold his fork with a chunk of pumpkin pie in surprise shock.

Don't cross me you repressed homo. I know he is...

Tuesday, November 22, 2005


42 years ago today, one of the defining tragic events in American history occurred: John F. Kennedy was assassinated.

I wasn't alive then to even know what that must have been like, but from what I hear, it was pretty traumatic for most of the country and the world to hear of. The President's brains were blown out by lone gunman Lee Harvey Oswald during the president's now notorious Dallas motorcade. Director Oliver Stone would have us believe everyone was involved: LBJ, the mob, the CIA, the FBI, Fidel Castro, and a whole slew of others were behind the scenes in order to knock off JFK. So many conspiracy theories
out there, it's hard to really know by now who's telling the truth and who's just full of bunk! I tend to want to believe Oswald acted alone, but the precision of his shots and the way that Zapruder film unfolds lead me to believe otherwise.

Kennedy rose to untouchable iconic stature after his murder, and little was known of how corrupt and messy his personal life truly was. Back then ya just didn't expose the President's dealings with the Mafia or his many affairs with women like you would now! Apparently John Kennedy was also a very sick man, and was on lots of medications just to function normally. Jesus, this must be the very first case of people realizing that even politicians were human after all.

Sad this had to happen really. Whether one likes or dislikes a President (as is the case with the much despised George Dubya), the assassination of such a figure is very drastic and traumatic to a country. It cuts deep at our hearts and souls, and the wounds are very difficult to recover from.

There are many sad moments in our lives that unite us through television, radio, and the Internet, but these pretty much stand out as the most traumatic modern American events of all time, events which smashed our collective innocence and naiveté, and shattered the illusion of how good life was and could be:

a) the assassination of JFK
b) the murder of John Lennon
c) the Space Shuttle Challenger Explosion
d) WTC-Pentagon 9/11 terrorist attacks

Some people have lived through all four, I can only remember the last two as forever being embedded in my mind. Time stopped when you first heard of these didn't it?

The question we all get is, "Where were you when..."

Monday, November 21, 2005


Not that it ends any of the insurgency nightmare in Iraq just yet or stops other terrorist attacks the world over(God knows there's plenty of kooks waiting to always cause mayhem).

But could it be that the man whom my last blog entry was about and also gives me the heebie-jeebies has been finally killed? A more vile creature like this deserves nothing more than to cease to exist:

It certainly would be a great victory to have this scumbag wiped off the face of the Earth. Not that I am God or anything, but don't you think some people just don't deserve to live? Living is a privilege and is intended for those who bring love, joy, and something constructive to our already tragic cruel existence.

Saturday, November 19, 2005


This man makes Osama Bin Laden look like a harmless sheep:

He has supposedly just recently released an
audiotape where he tries to explain and justify the hotel bombings in Jordan after all the protests from his "Muslim brothers and sisters" who were outraged at the cold-blooded murder of so many normal folk, especially those killed at that wedding reception last week. Even more reprehensible is his new threat towards the Jordanian King!

Al-Zarqawi truly is the devil incarnate. I could post a pic of him, but frankly, he gives me the heebie-jeebies.

And like Bin Laden, we can't seem to catch this guy.


Thursday, November 17, 2005


I'm not a huge Harry Potter fan at all, but I can tolerate the films on DVD I guess. Haven't yet seen any of them on the big screen. The books/films have been quite successful indeed.

There is however, so much negative rhetoric against the books/films that is quite pervasive and ridiculous!

Do people actually believe this sh*t??!! ASTOUNDING! You'd have to be mentally deranged

Tuesday, November 15, 2005


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------They can go out of their way to release DVD's with more special features, cell phones with all kinds of neat functions, amusement parks with bigger/faster rides, the IPOD with newer enhancements, movies with greater eye-popping special effects, and all kinds of stuff to keep humanity entertained.

But can all those great technological marvels hold up to the greatest most entertaining biological urge of all: SEX??!!! Nah, I don't think so. Even great technology is permeated and oversaturated with nothing but sex. The Internet, DVD's, videos, commercials, etc. all make billions thanks to people's fascination and unstoppable enjoyment of good ole'-fashioned porn. People love to get off and watch others go at it. It's a fact. Yours truly included. :)

Let's face it, it just feels too damn good to say no to. Just play safely o.k?

"'s natural, it's chemical (let's do it), it's logical, habitual (can we do it?) it's sensual, but most of is something we should do sex is something for me and you sex is natural -sex is good not everybody does it but everybody should, sex is natural -sex is fun, sex is best when it' on one, one on one..." --George Michael

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Monday, November 14, 2005


Not bad for a 63 year-old geezer to still be making this kind of music! Go Paul McCartney!

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Friday, November 11, 2005


----------------------- Rima and her father Moustapha Akkad, R.I.P.

The Jordanians are livid and indignant over the just occurred hotel bombings, and rightfully so, but is this what it takes for them to finally show their opposition to this kind of violent terrorism? Time to wake up people, and realize that sitting on your hands and doing nothing to these "Muslim brothers" of yours is now coming back to bite you in the ass.

For years, they've hated Israel and the United States, even though they claim to be our ally. Bullshit! The "peaceful" Muslim world has sat idly by, watching as these suicide bombing kooks have wreaked havoc the world over on Christians and Jews. Now it has come home to you, killing your own. Look at the daily killings in Iraq of regular citizens along with our U.S. soldiers. Do you not realize they do not value human life regardless? That using us (the infidels) as the excuse to kill, that you as well, the law-abiding Muslim will be murdered too?


Boy, these suicidal
terrorist guys need some serious porn. It's the repression and lack of a meaningful life that leads them to such desperate moves. Sad. So sad.

One of the personal stories that deeply moves me the most about all of this, is the death of filmmaker
Moustapha Akkad, (who was responsible for working on the Halloween horror films)and his stunningly gorgeous daughter at the Radisson bombing. So tragic.

Good people at the wrong place at the wrong time, murdered by extremist freaks of their own religion.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Someone please explain to me how this Austrian buffoon is the governor of the State of California? Mind you, I did like some of his propositions on yesterday’s ballot, notably the ones that were stricter with teachers and unions, since there are so many lazy freeloading jerks and beatches working in state and county jobs (I should know) that take advantage of the system and don’t pull their own weight---they depend on the hard-working honest employee (I should know) to do their shit---but alas, the messenger is too annoying and heavily-accented to get the word across and convince the populace properly, so they all went down in defeat.

Mercifully, the Australians thwarted a catastrophic terrorist attack just recently, but in Jordan, they weren’t so lucky. Three American hotels were bombed and the news of the horrible carnage is just coming in and developing.

No value for human life. Whatsoever. Terrorism in the 21st century is sadly our new ugly reality.

As they say in Spanish, "Ya ni llorar es bueno." (There’s no point in even crying anymore).

Tuesday, November 08, 2005


Mon Dieu et sacre bleu!

1789 again!

The French riots have gotten scary enough, that a state of emergency has been declared, meaning strict curfews are in effect. We'll see if these new measures help, for if anything flares up again tonight, it will be the 13th night in a row I believe of these severe disturbances.

A guy on the radio last night said that this is the begining of a new type of
intifada in Europe; for years they have allowed immigration of poor Muslims from former French colonies where in turn they have bred a new generation of French-born, yet distinct young people who do not identify with France or its culture. They are culturally Arab and follow Islam, and could give a crap about la Tour Eiffel or le Louvre! Add to this, haughty French racism and neglect, and you've got a recipe for true disaster!

And as we already know, what do angry fundamentalist MOOSELIMS like to do? Cause mayhem of course! We're seeing it here folks, right before our very eyes; it is terrorism, disguised as riots! French officials have said it is well-organized and they have targeted many major cities across the country. The angry mobs even went as far as to say they were upset at the government due to some headscarf ban in schools implemented about a year ago.

This is the country that would not go to war with us in Iraq not on the grounds that it was a quagmire, but because they wanted to appease their Muslim population and come out as heroes. Let's face it, the French are f**kin' sellouts and they are characteristically weak and in denial of real dangers. The Nazis overran them quickly during WWII, and the U.S. bailed them out of both major world wars. For years they've hated us (regardless of our president), because they're jealous that Napoleon does not rule the world anymore. They are ungrateful because their pride is too great at times. AMERICA ROCKS and they know it and hate us!

Granted, I do love their cuisine, culture, and language very much, and some of their people must be pretty cool, but the majority of them are so snobbish and uppity, as if their shit smells like eau de cologne or roses. NOW LOOK! LOOK AT THINE GREAT RÉPUBLIQUE MESDAMES ET MESSIEURS! I hope it survives the current chaos long enough so that I (this yucky American) can pay them a visit someday.

The American response to our loyal backstabbing French allies is freakin' hilarious and right on:

United States State Department spokesman Sean McCormack, asked to comment directly on the riots, said it was a French internal issue, and added, "certainly, as anybody would, we mourn the loss of life in these kinds of situations. But, again, these are issues for the French people and the French government to address."

So basically, you're on your own suckas!

THIS ARTICLE HERE has to be read to be believed. A GOOD READ INDEED!

Et le monde continue a regarder...

Sunday, November 06, 2005


So much going on, OH SO MUCH!

I had a spectacularly busy, yet satisfying weekend. Went to a house party on Friday night that my friend Steven invited me to and met some cute gay boys with whom I shared some good conversation and laughter, and we got to admire a hot exhibitionist supposedly straight black dude's body there without the expense of having to pay a stripper!

Saturday night, I went to The Factory in trendy homoplastic West Hollywood and had some fun dancing around with my co-worker/friend Lesly, but the blasting bass on the music got too much for my old ears and we left around 1:30a.m., about a half hour before
Ru Paul finally decided to show up and do his gig. Oh well. Homos do love Madonna, as was evidenced when her new song was played and they all went berserk on the dance floor.

Then today Sunday, Loren Soth took his cute puppy Patrick Beringer to the doggy park near my house, and I myself just got back from West Hollywood again, after a quick visit to
The Abbey to share some time with my friends.

The state of the world though, is much more serious than my petty life. The French are dealing with
serious riots, all due to the deaths of two Muslim teenagers a few days ago after supposedly being chased by the police. The Muslim immigrant community is furious over this, high unemployment, poor housing, and discrimination and have taken to the streets by torching cars and businesses all over the country! Either the French government is ignoring these people and they are rightfully fed up, or we have extremist Muslims at work here, now exhibiting the beginnings of a new form of terrorism on European soil. Whatever the case, the government is finding it a hard situation to get under control, and now the authorities are getting attacked! WOW!

There was a horrific lethal tornado that killed almost two dozen people in Indiana as it struck in the middle of the night, which only serves to show again my tiresome point that Mother Nature is pissed and she hath shown her wrath in 2005 oh so clearly!

We have an important special statewide election in California this Tuesday thanks to our ridiculous governor and I dunno if I'll get my absentee ballot in time, but I'm hoping my mailbox'll have something tomorrow.

Last but not least, this movie, THIS F**KIN' MOVIE, is generating lots and lots of buzz. Oh boy. I cannot wait now!

Saturday, November 05, 2005


After that great incredible renaissance of rock music we had back in the 1990's with all that amazing grunge/alternative scene which exploded with no end in sight it seemed around 1995/1996, then came the tragic downfall and great bands such as Nirvana, The Smashing Pumpkins, Soundgarden, and Rage Against the Machine dissolved and are only a mere memory now in 2005. We got invaded by Britney Spears, N'Sync, Hip-Hop, and other purely commercial pop music which sometimes is good, but not to the level of what the previous decade was producing in quality.

Well, there's this little rock band from Las Vegas, Nevada called The Killers, and upon listening to their album Hot Fuss, I am excited to hear something new and different all over again. Classified as indie rock by some, The Killers' debut album is actually quite good and catchy. I'm hoping these guys will continue to make better albums with this kind of quality and will survive in the very competitive and shallow music business. So far so good, selling about three million copies and counting of their first CD.

And that lead singer Brandon Flowers is such a hot guy too. Married now I guess, but I'm pretty sure he's smoked some man pole with ease in the past.

Probably still does now.

To watch/listen to some of their music videos, with particular attention to their best song All These Things That I've Done, go here:

Thursday, November 03, 2005


-- -----------------"Grim Death" by William Strand, 1800's -------------

Yesterday was El Día de los Muertos/Difuntos throughout most of Latin America, which kinda coincides with Halloween. It's a day set to honor our loved ones who have passed on and to morbidly remind us of our own eventual demise.

Yes, that's right, every human alive (or just barely) at this very moment is someday gonna take that final crap and kick the bucket. It trips me out to think that at one point we're all animated bodies with emotion, movement, and energy, and then we all ultimately deteriorate into geriatricness or just die young becoming this lifeless decaying rotting putrid corpse; a mere shell of our former living breathing selves.

For thousands of years, cultures have been trying to deal with and understand death, but in this we can all agree: it pretty much is gonna happen to all of us. Regardless of race, creed, religion, finances, sexual orientation, the Grim Reaper will eventually knock on our door and take us out of this dimension. Scientists say that if those us now living in 2005 can just hang on about twenty-five more years and not die (LOL), that maybe by then they'll be able to extend our lives into the hundreds of years, instead of the now common seventies or eighties. Perhaps cloning itself will offer too that "immortality" so many seek.

Of course, we all wanna die sweetly, in our old age, relatively healthy and in our sleep, but alas we do not get to really choose now do we? UGH! That's the crux of the whole issue, how tha hell are we all going to die? As awful as it is to even fathom, there's an innumerable amount of ways to buy the farm, the main ones being: accident, illness, old age itself, suicide, and/or homicide. When and where will it happen? At what age? Perish the thought and excuse the pun. No one really wants to think of this, as tempted as you may be to ask that Ouija board. I would pray and hope that the truly evil and wicked have hideous deaths while the righteous die peacefully, but alas, life can be cruel and unfair and it isn't always so. Anyone up for one of those Final Destination movies?

The question being, just what tha hell comes after? Heaven with St. Peter or Jesus? Hell with Satan and Adolf Hitler? Purgatory? Paradise? Another dimension? Lingering as a ghost here on Earth? Or more dreadfully, maybe there is nothing after; the lights just go out and that's it. It's over. We really only do live once as everyone always says.

This is not an easy subject for me to ponder or even write about. But it's f**kin' reality. I love life despite all the bullshit it puts me, you, and everyone else through, but alas, I cannot selfishly hold on to it, for I do have to admit that I could go at anytime and must lose it so one day regardless. Ain't it funny? As much sadness and tragedy as we all suffer through in this world, we still want to hold on to life no matter what; it is human instinct to want to live forever as long as the quality of one's life is at the very least decent.

And oh yeah, what becomes of this blog were I to suddenly croak??? I better draft up a will and testament huh? LOL!

For now, I'll try as much to enjoy this strange weird f**kin' trip. Even those seemingly sour moments like when some asshole tailgates me while driving. Really man, so many trivial things that bother us now, won't even freakin' matter later.

For one day, we shall be no more...


Famous last words here: