Wednesday, July 21, 2010


Monday was my birthday. And guess what I did?! I WENT TO THE DMV! To renew my license! YIPEE! It was a blast! I saw about two or three hotties there and the rest were really ugly people. LMAO! I know, I'm going to get ugly too as I get older; me and my a**hole comments and all. I'm still heartbroken. I don't even know why. I looked at myself in the mirror with a fresh new haircut recently and I think I look pretty damn hot if ya ask me and I've caught dudes checking me out lately in public. No joke. Monday was also the SEX, I mean, SIX year anniversary of this blog. That's right kids. So two milestones on the same day! AIN'T THAT A F*CKING KICK IN THA HEAD?! OH MY GOD--I AM SO BRIMMING WITH JOY AND COMPLETE HAPPINESS RIGHT NOW! ONLY A WORLDWIDE ALL-OUT NUCLEAR WAR WOULD MAKE IT EVEN BETTER!

I actually had my Hungarian bud play the Céline Dion Vegas show on DVD which I'd never watched, and it has got to be one of the cheesiest most horrid things I have ever had to view. It's just GOD awful and strangely entertaining at the same time! LOLOL! Seriously, I think Céline has an awesome voice and deserves all her amazing success because she really seems like a very humble sweet woman from very modest roots, but damn this show is excruciating at times to sit through! HA! Her backup dancers are quite irritating and corny, although I have to say the show seems to pick up a bit towards the end and stuff. But who am I to criticize or talk sh*t when the bitch was a huge success at Caesar's Palace and she has more money than God, so WHATEVER WAT! Now she's expecting twins, and will return to Las Vegas I believe sometime in the near future. And she's in love with an 80 year-old! Wish I could find true love in a senior citizen, but it's just not working for me I'm afraid. I get to go to my nifty awesome-paying tremendously exciting scintillating cubicle job while Céline just made the amount I make a year in less than a nanosecond. Good Lord Almighty.

It's the obscure songs that made The Beatles so damn amazing; not the hits, but the hidden gems! John Lennon wrote songs effortlessly:


RG said...

You're not getting older - you're getting better. I'd do you. LOL

A Lewis said...

I'd say that hot is exactly what you are. The mirror told the truth. Happy Birthday late....even though I told you on FB! Smooches.

D1RTY said...

damn kid that means I get to give ya a late birfday beatdown.

mkf said...

i'm gonna tell you something you're not gonna wanna hear [which, of course, is why you need to hear it].

your ex isn't the only one who's acting all narcissistic around here, cupcake--while his condition might be the result of a permanent personality disorder and yours is (hopefully) only temporary, you're pretty much operating the same way he is these days.

seriously, you are so focused on YOUR pain and heartache and how sad all this shit makes YOU feel, i'd be willing to bet you're pretty much useless to and oblivious of everyone around you right now.

i got a little taste of this myself in our recent email interaction: once you got what you needed outta my hospital-bound, pneumonia-ridden ass, i didn't even get a "thanks" from you, much less a "hey, get well soon"--you just blew right by me and went on to your next thing.

am i saying you're a naturally self-centered asshole? nah--what i'm saying is, depression and lovesick misery are extremely narcissistic, self-centered conditions--all the sufferer can think of is his/her own pain, because that's all they can see, and to hell with anything or anybody else.

the solution? there's only one: whether you feel like it or not, you need to get involved with something bigger than yourself--get off your sad ass and go help somebody who's worse off than you, and trust me, your own pain will diminish to the degree you get outside of and away from it.

[or you can continue to wallow in your misery until everybody around you is thoroughly sick of it and sick of you--your choice.]

sorry babe--somebody's gotta bitch-slap that pretty face and tell you to snap out of it already, and i guess since nobody else has stepped up, it'll have to be me.

drunkenly yours [and love ya mean it],


WAT said...

MKF: I resent some of the things you have said. I was genuinely concerned about your health, but also fell ill myself during that time with strep throat/bronchitis.

You're drunk though so I forgive you. You're calling me a narcissist? Yes, I am one, but not pathological or malignant. So there.

I try not to burden most folk with my pain anymore as I have chosen to isolate myself in many ways, so I get what you're saying. OR frankly I just don't talk about it anymore.

Thanks for wishing me a happy birthday and blogiversary though! LOL!

mkf said...

you're right--i shoulda pointed out that the fundamental difference between you and the ex (aside from the fact that his condition is permanent and yours is temporary) is that he spreads his pain around, while you turn yours inward.

but as much as you may try to spare those who care about you from what you're going through, trust me--they're feeling it.

looking at that picture of you up there tryin to smile and not quite pulling it off, i was struck by two things: (1) the pain in your eyes; and (2) how the person who made those cupcakes for you probably felt when they realized their efforts to cheer you up had failed once more.

look, i'm just some guy who comes around from time to time spewing my drunken opinions; take what you can use from them and disregard the rest. but please understand--i never try to be an asshole, it just comes out that way sometimes.

but also understand that, no matter how much you try to self-contain the pain, everybody around you who cares about you is going through it with you. you owe it to them and to yourself to get outside it anyway you can--put your focus outside yourself and it'll get better, i promise.

soberly yours,


alice said...

I know that at a time in my life, when I was heartbroken and destroyed, I talked about it to my family and friends, ad nauseam. But the thing is, if you don't talk about it, it stays inside and is toxic.

Your friend (?) mkf, does have a point. Distraction is the key. If you are helping someone else, (and believe me, I know how hard it is to extend yourself when you are depressed - motivation is at it's all time low at that time), you will find some relief there. My daughter didn't really see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel for a year after her boyfriend dumped her.... she became anorexic and drank too much. I know how devastating it really is. But there will come a time when you have control over how this has made you feel, instead of it controlling you. Until then, reach out as much as you can. It will feel good.

alice said...

Oh... and I hope your birthday was better, the part of the day that was not spent at the DMV!!! Happy Belated!!!