Wednesday, January 14, 2009

THE SECRET LIFE OF RYAN SEACREST?

OH MY GOD! Howard Stern is interviewing Sir Paul McCartney on today's show! The last time Stern had McCartney on, he was still stupidly in love with that pegleg Heather! Ya wanna hear that interview back in 2001? It's all here.

Okay. I didn't want to watch the new season of American Idol, but I gave in! Just for a little bit. I had it on in the background as I got ready for karaoke last night, and some of it was actually funny. They had auditions in Phoenix, and at one point Ryan Seacrest was at the Grand Canyon, and he almost tripped and fell down into the famous gorge! OH DAMN! Why didn't he fall in I ask; swallowed up by the rocks and the Colorado River below?! I'm horrible I know, but Ryan is such a tool; the most witless uncharismatic TV host EVER! I miss Dick Clark, who seemed forever ageless, but with that awful stroke he had, Dick now sounds pretty terrible. Bummer. We're now stuck with Ryan (America's most famous host), who reads copy well, and is decent on the eyes, but he has the personality of burnt toast!

I love me a good sex scandal, and apparently we got one brewing in the sports world! Apparently, a big black basketball player by the name of Eddy Curry was harassing and putting the moves on his MALE personal driver who is now suing! WHOA! Talk about being on the "Down-low!" Yeah, I've slept...UM....I MEANT: TALKED TO plenty of men who have girlfriends, wives, and/or children; these guys also lead secret gay lives. I guess this makes these men bisexual I suppose? Or they're just effectively hiding their true homosexuality? Hard to say really, because sexual orientation is just not easy to explain. It's not a black and white issue at all. Because we still live in such a chauvinistic alpha male culture, many men still find the need to pretend to be hetero. On the other hand, many men are actually content/happy with having girlfriends or being married to a woman, but like to play around with other dudes from time to time. Humans are interesting highly sexual creatures, and I think most of us would be surprised to find out about the true sex lives of most people, especially MEN. Remember Kinsey's studies? I think he was pretty accurate and ahead of his time with his findings to be quite honest. Excellent film by the way, the one starring Liam Neeson; A MUST-SEE!

But yes, women are right when they say men are dogs/pigs. It's so very true.

4 comments:

Ladrón de Basura (a.k.a. Junk Thief) said...

I like your word for Heather Mills. I call her a money hungry skag, but not a bad description on your part.

Men playing for both teams seems to be in vogue this week with that Ted Haggard special coming up and him now saying sexuality if a fuzzy, complex thing. I don't think it's all that complex, and it's pretty clear Ted can't pray the gay away.

Anonymous said...

http://weblogs.newsday.com/sports/basketball/knicks/blog/home/tiblogs/public_html/sports/basketball/knicks/blog/davidlee.jpg

Pfft.... look at his pic. As I quote "Nigga Please Beyatch" I've been harressed twice by men of color who were straght at ugly as sin. Mr. Norm Vaughn of Kaiser and a Mr. Kent Turner of Edison. If I had the money I would have sued to. The last guy was such a pig cuase he slept around the office and had multiple counts of haressing both male and female employees. Sadly Volt Employment Services let go of people who were harressed...and well lets say make the innocent people life hell.

Hope the "Niggah" pays through the nose. Yeah I posting anonymus...but use people know who I ams.... a brutha gots to keeps it realz. PEACE OU Y'ALL!!!!

Amadeus said...

I hadnt heard of this news at all. So this must mean they were lying to any women they banged? I hope not, thats like a death sentence for people who don't know whats going on. That is the lowest of the low that one human can do to another.

I have not been harrassed for my nasty bits by any women, but if so I would at least hope it would be someone attractive, safe, sane, lucid, spiritually adept, whimsically comedic, wholly erudite and utterly fascinating.

My god I just described J-lo. Not!

Anonymous said...

I met Ryan when he was still a nobody on the radio, during his appearance at one of our golf tournaments. He was friendly but had as much charisma as a bag of rocks. And he's so short...