IT'S ONLY 2 IN THE MADRUGADA.

Hello and happy Friday. Work sucks. Yeah yeah...

The greatest TV show ever was Twin Peaks, because David Lynch is a genius and it influenced every other show I am about to mention here, but I digress...

Okay, maybe I've ranted about this before, but how do you people find tha freakin' time to watch so much television?! This is the kind of thing I used to do when I was a teenager--I don't got that kind of time no more you bastards! I'm either at work and on the Internet, or at home sleeping or on the Internet! LOL! But there's all these shows friends and people I chat with online tell me that I should watch: Entourage, Dexter, Weeds, Mad Men, House, 30 Rock, Lost, and I still have yet to see Six Feet Under, which everyone raves about. I did watch some of The Sopranos, but I wasn't all that impressed really. Seen that before in The Godfather movies already quite honestly, or any other gangster movie ever made. Mind you, I have watched some of those shows I've just mentioned, but to make time for every week or whole entire seasons on DVD?! No tengo el tiempo. I'm more of a movie person anyway, since those can be digested in about two hours, whereas a show has to be followed weekly and shit. I love shows that deal with supernatural horror though like Supernatural of course, or the really great Roswell, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and Angel of television past. I will most likely make time for True Blood, because that show I hear is phenomenal, and it's about vampires, and I love blood-sucking creatures of the night! Well, any kind of sucking at night period! HEE!

It's so late already as I write this, but what else is new? I'm an incorrigible night owl I'm afraid, and this is why having a morning job doesn't work for me anymore. It just f*cking doesn't! So I desperately need to find work or whatever other nice-paying task out there to start around 11am and beyond. I mean, seriously! My current job cramps my night owl partying-style baby. So many times I hear co-workers criticize me for being so rebellious in my mid-thirties and not acting my age or settling down, but it's all due to me being such a well-behaved and homebodyish person once before--I never went out or did any sort of wild things in my teens or early 20s. It's only now that I have the car to take me everywhere, the age to do what I want, and the confidence/self-esteem to see L.A. in all its full nighttime glory! Only to be ruined by having to worry about going to bed early enuff to make it to f*cking work at 9am! UGH! YUCK! LOLOLOL! I know, I know, I need to take stock of what is important, and my job comes first right? Because it does after all provide me with the money to pay for my survival and I should make an effort to improve my attendance and be there at a reasonable time but NOOOOOOOOOOO WAT, NOOOOOOOOOOO, you just have to always be out late on weeknights at some karaoke bar, or on someone's couch getting high laughing at 30 Rock episodes, or just having sex with the entire city of Los Angeles, and then you wonder why you hate your job and feel so sleepy at it most of the time! GROW UP ALREADY MAN! Time to get serious here!

Nah, go to hell. Go to hell ye retarded responsibilities. Imma be dead some day anyway. I want to live. And milk the youth (or be milked hoohoohaha), I still have left for all its worth.

One of the best moments in awards show history:

I'M HERE TO BLOG?!

"There must be some way out of here," said the joker to the thief,
"There's too much confusion, I can't get no relief.
Businessmen, they drink my wine, plowmen dig my earth,
None of them along the line know what any of it is worth."

"No reason to get excited," the thief, he kindly spoke,
"There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke.
But you and I, we've been through that, and this is not our fate,
So let us not talk falsely now, the hour is getting late." --Bob Dylan

Ho hum.

Why couldn't I be some vapid airheaded dumbass? NOOOOOOOO! Instead I had to be given this highly intellectual brain to think of all these lovely pretty thoughts with! BOOOOOOOO! I tells ya, the human species is the saddest one there ever was. For all the greatness achieved in arts and creativity, we're still the most unhappy, unsatisfied, and lonely of all of God's creatures. The fact that we possess such a complex brain, makes for a very delicate existence prone to terrible sadness and longing. We're on this tiny floating rock in the middle of nowhere in the vastness that is space, and yet we have no idea why. Where tha hell do we come from anyway? Religion has all those incredible stories of how we got here and the wonders of a higher power, yet who's to say if all that stuff is even true? I want to believe in God more often than not, but then I think about all the injustice, pain, suffering, and wonder if we are truly alone in this dimension. Well, alone perhaps not entirely, because then there's the extraterrestrials somewhere out there, but for now it seems we're pretty much on our own. We can be so kind and loving towards each other, yet more often than not, humanity is greedy, envious, selfish, and destructive. We live in complete delusion/distraction most of our lives--going to school, going to work, making friends, traveling, entertaining ourselves with various outlets, and overbreeding a new generation time and time again of more inadequate people. Why?! Why do we even f*cking bother?! It's all gonna end the same for us all anyway correct?! That's right, we're all gonna just kick the bucket someday and that'll be it. Done. Over. Finito. I suppose it's nice to dream of an afterlife or lovely flowery other dimension, but I dunno man. The way things seem to be panning out in my mind, this may be our one and only chance! They always do say, "You only live once", is that not right?

I suppose we must make of life what we want it to be, and that we all have a different purpose, so it's not a complete waste of time I guess. LOLOL! It's no wonder I named my blog what I did, for the existentialist in me is always festering under the surface of my usually pleasant and goofball demeanor. I don't entirely hate life, nor do I wish to end my life at this time, but I do think so much of it is painfully absurd. It really is. I have to laugh more often than not at the amazing confusion of it all. We're just never going to get it--not with so many opinions or so many viewpoints on what the truth really is. This is what ultimately dooms our species to eternal dissatisfaction and solitude. True, there are scientific logical facts, but how do those help clear up our neverending quest for the meaning of it all? I pray and hope that you have found your calling in this life--for it's definitely not the car, the house, the job, or any of the other silly material possessions we like to accumulate. I suppose it may just be, as The Beatles once so cheesily sang it, "The love you take is equal to the love you make." People like Adolf Hitler and Ted Bundy however, didn't quite own up to this thought, so their purposes were completely different I'm guessing. So what tha hell am I here for anyway?! What major contributions am I making with my time here?

Oh well, might as well laugh at the absurdity that follows--this brilliant Emmy moment brought to you by the very zany Jimmy Fallon, which that stick-up-his-arse Kevin Kline did not find funny at all:

A SIMPLE, POSSIBLY RETARDED, BUT HEARTFELT POEM WRITTEN BY YOURS TRULY.

Is it love?
Is it fate?
This feeling I'm feeling
has come so late

Is it love?
Is it fate?
For all I want from you
is a simple date

Is it love?
Is it fate?
The moments I am with you
are terrifically great

Is it love?
Is it fate?
That my heart be broken
like I once did my mate

Is it love?
Is it fate?
This vulnerability
that I so hate

Is it love?
Is it fate?
How much longer
will I have to wait...

--by WAT

SERENA AND KANYE DID WHAT?!

I'm very sorry to hear of Patrick Swayze's death, but pancreatic cancer is pretty f*cking fatal most of the time. Like Farrah before, I guess somehow we all knew he wouldn't make it, but humans always cling to the hope of life and survival--it's a basic instinct. Patrick was adorable! My God man! As I ranted to my beloved friend earlier, I just can't get over how much cancer still kills people--seems like everyone gets it and dies from that shitty disease! UGH! All this money for research and still no kick-ass cure?! WHAT?! Must be all about making money off those horrid chemo treatments or something. It's just downright pathetic, and I'm just incensed I tells ya. I really hope I never get cancer, and would much rather prefer to die while sucking on a penis or something more pleasurable. JESUS MARIMBA! A jolting reminder once again of our inevitable mortalities...

I really wasn't in the mood to go out Saturday night, but I forced myself to go to my co-worker's/bud's place in Woodland Hills (a bit of a drive but not too bad) for a very worthy cause--not only was it a fundraiser, but it also turned out to be a great excuse to party! Here's is the crux of the matter:

13lovestories.com

Come out and support the LGBT community as we raise awareness towards marriage equality. It is not only time for our voices to be heard, and for barriers to be broken across all stereotypes, now is the time for change.

Yeah, so the event was actually quite fun and there was lots of good food there and I ate like a pig, but thankfully I did not get major indigestion or anything, which is like totally awesome ya know?!

Anyway, I got a little slideshow to share with ya of me and other guests at the fundraiser. Hope ya like:

EL ONCE DE SEPTIEMBRE.

Happy 9/11 everybody! LOL! The day we got our balls handed to us...

UGH! Eight years since the Hollywood blockbuster-style terrorist attacks on New York and Washington, and where's Osama Bin Laden?! WHERE THA HELL IS HE?! Wasn't he the evil mastermind behind the whole damn thing? And here we are all these years later and nothing. Bush left the country in shambles thanks to that event, so I guess Bin Laden did good in bringing America down quite a bit. Oh whatever. Seems like all that horrible stuff happened so long ago. I think most of the country has moved on and has become more cynical to it all, because we haven't had anything major happen anymore, and because we just don't wanna live in fear. I mean, who cares right? We all gotta die sometime anyway, so might as well just LIVE! It's obvious we're are at each other's throats again politically and all that singing and holding hands on the Capitol steps was a bunch of baloney!

Which brings me to Wednesday night's speech to Congress by President Obamee. Okay, what the hell was the point of this outburst?! I'm most sure you all know of the incident by now. Obama had to deny all the silly claims about his health plan, and it took the mention of the illegals to get this guy and the Republicans all worked up. It's always the illegals! LMAO! My God man, I ain't no Obama worshipper and did not even vote for the dude, but doesn't he deserve some respect?! STFU! Right-wingers who have the nerve to conveniently forget all the damage their beloved Bush did make my head spin! Rush Limbaugh, Michelle Malkin, and Glenn Beck spewing their utter bullshit on the airwaves and in print is downright irresponsible journalism--Obama is not perfect and not the savior of the country, but he has only been in office eight months and you morons want to blame the entire Bush-Cheney diarrhea years on our half-breed new guy? THAT IS COMPLETELY UNFAIR! YES! STOP IT ALREADY AND GROW UP YOU CHILDISH IMMATURE BRATS FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL! By the way, Pelosi's reaction to the guy shouting out that Obama is a liar was priceless. She seemed really incensed and was almost scoffing. HAHA! And check out the bitch's expensive pearl necklace! Yeah, other presidents have gotten booed I hear, but whatever. "I don't want the president indoctrinating my children!" UGH! WHY DID YOU PEOPLE EVEN BREED AND HAVE CHILDREN?! LOSERS! And I am no liberal talking here so shut up. I'm a moderate thank you very much...

I'm going to make it a fine fine weekend. I'm in a very frustrated and in an almost apathetic mood lately, as if I just wanna let my hair down and be in the middle of a 30-man orgy or something to that effect. HEE! Always use protection of course. Ahem.

Antonio Banderas and his blond bimbo wife doing an interview in his native Spain back in 2005 I believe. Melanie's Spanish is fantastic! NOT! Entertaining to behold this spectacle--I actually like Melanie in all her airheaded drug-addicted broken Spanish glory:

"NA NA NA NA NA NA NAA, NA NA NA NAAA, HEEY JUDE!"

WHAT?! LABOR DAY WEEKEND IS OVER?! WHAT GIVES?! I was having such a nice time too. I did not go anywhere special or out of town, but I did spend quality time with all kinds of good friends and stuff. Yes, it was pleasant all-around. The only problem being that in a couple of hours, it's back to the wonderful office which I adore! I completely forgot about looking into my next career move over the weekend too--I don't wanna give it away just yet for fear I may jinx it, but I got a plan of sorts. Crossing my fingers I don't procrastinate it like I do everything in my life. Hey, I watched this remake called, The Last House on the Left. I have never seen the Wes Craven original, but this 2009 version was pretty damn good. Excellent horror film for the upcoming Halloween season and stuff, but I must warn you that the brutality and violence is quite disturbing, and yet somehow it works for this movie, because it kind of validates the whole entire plot, especially towards the end. You'll see what I mean if you decide to sit through this, but the suspense is almost unbearable at times--very well-executed and almost perfectly acted. So there! WHEW! What a ride! I watched the unrated version by the way, so I guess it's more graphic.

Oh, I sure hope I don't bore you with more Beatles-related news, but I'm going to bore you with Beatles-related news! It's a big week, because we got two huge releases: The Beatles: Rock Band and the complete re-release of their original albums super duperly remastered in the best quality sound ever available! The box set alone I was told is $200 and change, but well-worth it because so many of those albums on CD as I own them right now have poor sound quality using 1988 technology, when they were first released onto digital discs from vinyl records. So many of those songs will sound more amazing now I'm sure, so I can't wait, even though I'll have to spend my entire upper torso! I won't bother with the video game, because I don't even own a Playstation or Wii, but I'm sure a good friend somewhere out there will get it/have it or whatever. Plus, there's plenty of footage already on YouTube, so it's cool. It's the audio stuff that I'm pining over ladies and gentleman! YEEHA! I can't wait, although from what my dear beloved bud P.V. told me, the box sets are kind of sold-out as the demand has been tremendous. Can you even believe that a band that has been broken-up and dead for close to 40 years can still generate this kind of excitement and money?! That is astonishing and a testament to the enduring legacy of these four Englishmen, who quite literally changed the world--they are just endlessly fascinating really.

VH-1 Classic has got a whole nine days dedicated to The Beatles, as the two big releases (the video game and remastered albums) go on sale on 9/09/09, which is tomorrow. Hmmm, just flip that date upside down will ya? OOOOOOOOOOO! Eerie:

LABOR DAY WEEKEND 2009.

The cantaloupe I'm eating as I write this is as sweet as honey. Delicious!

When el pendejo idiota Bush was in office (and what a shitty 8 years those were), people were complaining. Obama is now the leader of the land, and people are still complaining!!! Every day and night with these liberals and conservatives fighting each other! ARGH! ENOUGH!!! Can't we all just work together to move this country forward and into progress?! The United States is so divided! Ironic, but true. Now all this brouhaha over the health plan and that Obamerz is gonna give a speech to the schools and talk to the kiddies about their education next week and that it's just an excuse for him to indoctrinate them with Marxist or fascist ideas. WHAT?! I'm no big Obama fan myself, but since when is a president addressing kids at school a bad thing?! They got teachers and schoolmates that influence them more on a daily basis than the president talking to them for one measly day! He's not even personally going to any schools, he's doing it through the Internet anyway--CHILL OUT PEOPLE! Sometimes I think this country is full of whiners and haters who love to stir shit up just because they enjoy the f*cking drama, like the assholes at our homeowner's association meetings. Stay away from me ye evildoers! LOL! People need to get laid or something.

Of course, I have no set plans for this Labor Day weekend. I never have any set plans period other than to go to work, and one of my co-workers/buds absolutely hates this about me. "Why don't you ever commit to something and give definite answers to people?" YEAH YEAH YEAH, get off my back will ya? Okay, I admit that maybe my life could use a little more planning ahead and organization, but I'm surviving am I not? I look pretty good don't I? What more do you agenda-carrying weirdos want from me?! Mind you, I agree that a massive trip to Europe or party should be planned, but for the most part I like to be kind of spontaneous with my "free" time--play it by ear to see what comes up. What I really need to look ahead to is heading out more and enjoying the outdoors. I definitely don't do enough of that, which is why I have seen at least 3 billion movies via Netflix in the past three years or so. LOL! I'm moderate in my outlook on things. I love being a homebody, but I also love going out to eat, movies, or whatever when it feels right. And I'm more of a night owl anyway! The sun is pretty and essential and all that but the rays will damage my skin and make me look old, and so far I am vainly defying my true age. So yeah, I am Madonna pasty/pale, but I've been considering going to the beach sometime this weekend perhaps to work on a tan and pick up some hot men. HA! My scheduling precise bud would cringe at this answer, but as I like to say, "We'll see or maybe I'll go the beach this weekend?" And a maybe from me does not always mean "no" so don't even go there.

I love this commercial and so do you:

I'D EVEN TRY TO HAVE FRIENDS IN POLAND IF I COULD.

Drama in our back yard here all over Los Angeles. As you all may have already heard on the news, we got a bad fire that is out of control in the northern mountainous regions of the city. People with homes in those hilly areas have been evacuated, some of them refused and are now trapped, two firefighters were sadly killed when their car overturned or something trying to escape the flames, TV/radio towers and the observatory on Mt. Wilson there are in danger, and the plume of smoke that has risen above the area looks like a nuclear bomb went off. The acrid scent of smoke is everywhere now, and it's really aggravating people's allergies. I can see the flames at night from my pad; when I look towards those mountains and the unmistakable orange glow. Just when I thought there was nothing left to burn in this state, we have to deal every year now with these massive destructive and very polluting fires. It's becoming all too common--the temps the last three days or so have been out-of-this-world HOT. The joys of living in Southern California! LOLOLOLOL! Trust me people, Hollywood makes it all look great and glossy, but life is very tough out here. Sad for the people who own homes in these areas, and as my beloved bud pointed out, scary for all the wild and domesticated animals too.

I have met so many people throughout the past decade or so by going to the same general local bars for karaoke or through chat rooms online, and what I have come to realize is that even though there are lots of folks who are shallow and lame, there are truly some nice good kind people out there as well with the same problems and issues that I have. Yes, even in a town as vapid as Los Angeles, I have had the fortune of meeting some really awesome people here--they've graciously invited/taken me into their homes and given me insight into their private lives. I had never taken time to put this all into perspective, but it's hit me all of sudden tonight, that I've actually made some cool friends! I don't always get the chance to see them all as often as I would like, but when I do see them, I realize how much I appreciate them for who they are, warts and all. I've met countless people born and raised in L.A. like myself who are cool, and other rad souls from states such as Mississippi, New York, Texas, Kentucky, and Kansas of course! From ages as young as 21 to as old as 70! I just want them to know at this moment how much I appreciate you all for your sense of humor, for teaching me new things, and for genuinely liking me for who I am. This admission is eerily similar to my rant not long ago about how many cool people I know at work that I genuinely have grown to care for. I was becoming so socially withdrawn at one point years ago, but in admitting and embracing my homoness for good in the past twelve years, I realize that this is when my friendships began to truly blossom. Anyway, enough of this rant, but if you read this and feel I am talking personally to you, I probably am, because you took the time to check this blog entry out. Hell, I've even become somewhat attached to my regular blog readers as well. So there!

Do you realize what amazing historic day it is today? September 1, 1939! GERMANY INVADED POLAND! The start of the greatest war of all time! WORLD WAR F*CKING TWO! UNREAL! More than 70 MILLION people died in that war, and never has the planet been in such armed conflict, before or since! Hitler, the Japanese, FDR, Churchill, Stalin, the Holocaust, atomic bombs, submarines, airplanes, D-Day--what a horrible, fascinating and legendary time indeed, and it's been 70 years man--not that long ago, and yet so many from that monumental generation are gone:

LIFE HAS ITS UPS...

And so, I find myself as of late in a terrible emotional state of inadequacy, loneliness, emptiness, and forced conformity.

What good was it to go to college, when all I got out of it was personal enlightenment and a brain full of fascinating but useless facts--not the career I had originally intended? Instead, I've had a job now for the better part of eight and half years that has become boring, monotonous, and completely non-challenging nor creative. I can't just up and leave it either, for my financial responsibilities are great, and the never-ending cycle and trap of the bills and a home to pay keep me forever imprisoned it seems. But more and more, my attendance and punctuality to the office suffer as a result of my growing depression--all that once wonderful time I had on the books is slowly but surely dwindling away, as I find it increasingly difficult just to get up in the morning and go in. There are those days I do take off work, and then they are wasted away by me sleeping hours and hours, hibernating away to escape my reality. My co-workers can be kind and lend me an ear, but they can only go so far as to help me in my misery, for it is I who ultimately has the power to decide what to do with myself when it comes to making a living. I honestly wish I did not have to worry about money right now or ever, but alas, I do not have the fortune of having comfortable amounts of cash to fall back on, so I can take time off to ponder my next moves or to find myself as a human being. This kind of self-exploration and decision-making was supposed to happen in my late teens and early twenties, but instead I got trapped by the office cubicle world into believing that time would be on my side forever. The only thing that has happened is that time has passed mercilessly fast, and although not old by any means, I am OLDER and much more chained by my situation than I was back in my true youth. I work it seems, only to make the rich RICHER and to pay taxes to our crooked corrupt government, but where's my personal satisfaction? I HAVE NONE! ZILCH! Anxiety/depression thwarted me then, and continue to oppress me even now.

Then comes the recent realization that my earlier beliefs in romance and sex have been completely overturned by my "maturing" as a person. I could easily have tons of meaningless casual one-night stands here and there before, and be fine with it, but as of late I have grown tired and sick of it all really. Don't get me wrong, I always had at least something in common and was a gracious friendly person with most of my conquests, but what do I have to show for it now, other than to feel alone and used by all those people?! Yes, can you imagine that?! I FEEL CHEAP AND USED NOW! Now my quest for settling down and finding that one person will be tough, for I wonder if karma has now decided to rain down upon me and make me feel all these terrible sad emotions of loneliness and unrequited love that I made my original partner feel back when HE wanted to settle down, but I wasn't ready for it. This has all begun to pollute my brain due to recent run-ins with casual encounters from my past and feelings of infatuation which I haven't felt in years. I love sex, don't get me wrong, but it is now becoming tedious only to be wanted for this purpose alone! Yes, I happen to have one of the world's most pleasurable penises (LOLOLOL!), but is that all there is to me? Am I not charming, good-looking, witty, funny, and intelligent enough to get to know; to take out on dates or vacations as well?! Since when did I become such a romantic sap I wonder?! HOW IN THA HELL DID THIS EVER HAPPEN TO A ONCE MIGHTY AND PROUD INVULNERABLE SOUL LIKE MYSELF?!

I was once so strong and aloof to all of this. I really was. Life used to full of endless possibilities for me where nothing felt like an obstacle or chore, but now all I feel is unmotivated, completely defeated, and programmed like a robot to do what I have to do, and that's it. What tha hell has happened to me and why can't I see the light at the end of this bitter dark tunnel? The worst part is when I start to stupidly compare my life to that of others and how others seem to be going places and forging ahead, while I'm still stagnant and stuck in the mud. To be employed, even in this massive economic depression does not help to make me feel better at all. AT ALL. I can count my blessings till the cows come home, but alas, my feelings of failure are powerful at times.

As of late, it is fascinating historical documentaries such as this which keep me mercifully distracted and somewhat entertained. The late great Sir Laurence Olivier narrates:

AN INGLORIOUS GERMAN PAST.

I went to see Inglourious Basterds on Saturday. This is one long film, and although I liked many aspects of the movie--it is in the end, a flawed picture. Brad Pitt annoyed me after a while with his character and ignoramus Southern accent. The preposterous rewriting of certain key historical elements was downright retarded! We all know Hitler died of suicide in his underground bunker, but this film wants us to believe otherwise?! Absurd in my opinion, truly absurd! And although I don't mind reading subtitles AT ALL, I wonder if most lazy Americans are aware that this movie almost qualifies as a foreign film, because so much of it is in French and German--you betta be ready to read through lots of subtitles, although I found it cool to hear all that French, because it only helps me practice my third language more. And director Tarantino loves to be graphically violent of course, which I don't f*cking care for, but okay then, I can look away I guess, which I did many many times. All that negativity aside, there are some wonderful moments in the film, and true suspense created just through the dialogue alone! There are some true acting greats here and congrats go to Austrian actor Christoph Waltz as the main Nazi officer who performs flawlessly as the multilingual evil cold-blooded "Jew Hunter"--he is almost certian to get an Oscar nomination for this role. Mélanie Laurent is also good as the French Jewish girl who escapes death and plots revenge as a the owner of a movie theater in Paris. I can't forget to mention Diane Kruger too, for she is great as a German actress that wants to help the Allies topple the Nazis. Anyway, can Hollywood please stop making WWII Holocaust films now?! I know it was a horrible time, but GEEZ, leave the poor Germans alone already! LOL! GOOD LORD MAN! Haven't they been vilified enough?! Where's the Spaniard-bashing for all their atrocities back in the 16th century against native peoples?! The Nazis however, and that dark era were relatively recent, and it truly remains one of the most fascinating/monstrous periods in the history of the world.

The news is full of insane sensational stories this week! Michael Jackson's death is now considered a homicide, because his doc was knowingly/illegally injecting him with mass quantities of powerful drugs and anesthetics. Jesus man, I guess I still can't believe MJ is truly dead, but his bizarre physical transformation and terrible emotional issues could only lead to the icon's demise in such a manner anyway. Michael was obviously a very unhappy person, and it almost seems like a relief for him that he no longer has to face such scrutiny from the media and insane public attention. Then there's the news story of that handsome seemingly successful reality show contestant that strangled his blonde bimbo wife, dismembered her, cut her fingers off, yanked out all her teeth, and stuffed her into a suitcase so that she could not be identified, but it was thanks to her breast implants that they were able to ID her and the manhunt was on, but he hung himself in a cheap motel in his homeland, Canada before the cops could get to him. YIKES! What a terrible end to a rocky crazy relationship I must say--a hottie loony scumbag and an airhead stripper porn whore! Astounding, simply astounding!

I owe some of you major visits to yer blogs. Scold me/remind me will ya?

The greatest WWII-Holocaust-Nazi film ever made. Magnificent performances, and the original trailer has some fine music:

A NEGATIVE AND A NEGATIVE EQUAL A POSITIVE.

It was so sweet. My 11 year-old niece needed help with her homework this past week. She's learning integers! Remember integers? It's all those positive and negative numbers--brought it all back to me in a flash even though I haven't used that kind of basic math in ages! That was cool. I hope I explained it to her correctly, but I think she got the gist of it. I feel like such a smart uncle now. HA! Math has never been my strong point, but I guess I do know some of my stuff. I successfully completed Algebra II, so it counts for something I hope.

Rachel Maddow is a trip. I try and pay attention to what she's saying, but she is one weird-looking person! LOL! Call me naive, but I had no idea she was a lesbian, but always looked at her as a very masculine mannish kind of girl--even with that make-up, or in spite of it. Turns out of course, that she is lez, and the first openly gay person with this kind of news/political talk show. Anderson Cooper of course, already has his program, but he is not OPENLY gay. We all know Anderson is into men, but like Ricky Martin, it is considered an open secret. Everyone knows, but does not mention/speak of it I guess. This is kind of what occurs with me most of the time I believe, but whatever. I'm getting distracted here, but my point being is that Rachel Maddow is one fascinating character! I'd love to see a debate between her and Rush Limbaugh! That would be classic! I must say, Rachel makes for one pretty boy (kinda of Peter Pannish as my friend said), and is much easier on the eyes I guess than Greta Van Susteren. GRETA! EEK!

A shout out to my mother. Mi querida madre is to me, a fantastic cook! She can make canned soup taste like a true feast! Her basic sandwiches and other easy-to-prepare meals are so delicious and I genuinely love her creative skills in the kitchen--I've been meaning to compile a cookbook of some sort with my mom's recipes to have for future posterity, but I never get around to it. She truly does make some good simple meals.

I wish thee a tremendous weekend. John Lennon wrote songs that really spoke to you, that expressed how he truly saw the world, and reflected what many were thinking but never admitted back in his day. A political/social genius ahead of his time:

JUST WHEN I THOUGHT I HAD WRITER'S BLOCK.

I bought my first ever water pipe (bong) ladies and gentlemen! It's a cute little glass thing, and very efficient. Yeah, I'm tired of smoking that tobacco (AHEM) with dem small portable pipes, because it burns and doesn't deliver the stuff as effectively. Amen. I know my beloved highly conservative anti-drug bud was upset at me for this, but it's not like I'm snorting coke or doing meth for crying out loud! I mean, I don't drink alcohol or smoke cigs at all really--my once or twice-a-week habit is perfectly under control! The wonders of nature's herb man! Yes, I know it is still illegal, but I'm not growing or selling the stuff, so get off my back! I suppose there will always be people against Jane, Mary and I guess I understand because there are those who truly do abuse the stuff and are always baked and retardedly stoned, but I am not like this at all, and know when and where to use it occasionally and truly sparingly. Incredibly, pot doesn't make me stupid at all. It actually calms my anxieties tremendously, makes me very cool, honest, and highly creative! I could write a novel or a song on that stuff if I set my mind to it! The best thing though is to get laid, eat some good grub, listen to music, then just relax. And stand-up comedy routines and jokes in general become wittier and funnier when high. HONEST! Being sober all the time sucks balls. It is mighty stressful and uncomfortable to have to face life without the help of this wonderful enhancer! I don't worry about bills, my failed career, or my skinny arms when I'm stoned! And movies/TV in high definition are amazing when under the influence! THE COLORS MAN!

Madonna went on an Italian cruise with her young virile Brazilian model boyfriend, and brought along her two African adopted kids and Lourdes to celebrate her 51st birthday. Way ta go Madge! I'm all for it. My one gripe though is: WHERE THA HELL WAS ROCCO?! You see, Rocco is the only fully white Anglo child Madonna has! He should be in these pics/article as well, but NO! No sign of the Ritchie boy at all! Was Guy Jr. caught up with school? Maybe his dad didn't want him to hang out with all those non-white people! LOLOLOL! I'm a bit concerned to be honest! I have to say though that Lourdes is growing up to be a mighty fine pretty young lady, and looks very much like her mother, only with that strong Puerto Rican side that Madonna could never achieve, despite all the Spanish motifs in her songs and sh*t. I can't wait to see what will become of Lourdes. Will she become a pop star like mommy? Or a real fine actress, unlike mommy? LMAO! Time will tell. And dem adopted black kids! MY GOD MAN! What will they be like when they grow up?! This will only get more interesting! I hope to live long enough to see the progression of all this earth-shattering excitement!

Everyone else at the Joan Rivers Roast was hurling insults left and right (some were truly great and funny), but it was Gilbert Gottfried that masterfully told a riveting story and whom I believe was the most hysterical of them all. This Jew is a comedic genius--he calls Kathy Griffin SWAMP THING?! AHAHAHAHAHAAAAA! Hilarious:

CHIQUITITA, TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG?

It's been a good productive work week! YEEHA!

Goodness gracious, my head is spinning with all this talk and arguing over health care reform. UGH! Whom to believe?! The plan sounds really cool and all, but then there's been all these town hall meetings where average American citizens are fuming mad at Obama's plan. And the conservative right-wing assholes on Fox and radio are having a field day ripping the president to shreds over what they call "evil socialist Nazi" Obama policies. Lemme tell ya something folks, while I am not goo goo gaga over Obama and did not vote for him, it incenses me that assholes like fat slob Rush Limbaugh would have the nerve to talk all this shit against the prez, and conveniently forget all the monumental damage the previous f*cktard in office has left us with! IT DRIVES ME UP THE WALL! But anyway, the ridiculous cost of a hospital stay, surgery, and prescription medication in this country is truly nightmarish, and something has to be done. Is Obama's plan the answer though?! I can't form an opinion on the subject, because I'm not as well-informed, but I am glad this debate is taking place at least, because it is about time SOMETHING be done to reform such a seemingly greedy, cold, and heartless system. Is Obama's idea though, the way to go?!

Hey, so we sure can't get The Beatles back together again for a reunion tour, but we still have ABBA right?! Now why in tha hell won't that hugely successful pop group go out on some massive world tour already?! I mean, milk it for all its worth ye Swedish yakgellarz! Hell, I'd pay to go to one of those concerts, and there are still millions who adore them, so it would undoubtedly be a smash hit of epic proportions. They have consistently gotten huge money offers to get back together again, but I think the dudes are not interested at all. Well, they made their cash already I suppose, and continue to get songwriter royalties and profits from side projects like the Mama Mia! musical and stuff. Abba recorded the bulk of their material in English, because frankly it is the language that musically "speaks" to the entire planet, but they were also quite intelligent to realize at the time that the other big language used to achieve pop star success internationally is Spanish, and they recorded lots of songs in that Romance tongue as well, even more than their native Swedish! This assured the band true international recognition/superstardom, and as a native Spanish speaker, their accent was quite good/convincing I must say! Quite frankly, this group was true pop songwriting at its finest.

The weekend is here, and it's time to chill! And you're gonna watch/listen to this ABBA medley en español okay? Gracias:

PASS THE ASPARAGUS.

Hello little blog. I'm sooooo tired as I write this. Exhausted even. Work is already kicking my ass, and the week has just begun. Life's so damn hard sometimes. I've been a bit depressed lately and cry easily at unresolved issues within my life. What else is fucking NEW?! I just HAD to be this sensitive emotional dumbass basket case of a human being in this lifetime! OH BROTHER! The Gods of Olympus are royally cruel man! If only I had a magic wand (and no, NOT MY PENIS) to wave around and make everything nice and fair, not just for me, but for you too my brothers and sisters. Alas, so be it. THIS DIMENSION IS ONE GIANT MASSIVE BALL OF ROTTING BULLSHIT AND IT IRKS THA F*CK OUT OF ME SOMETIMES. There, I think I feel better now for the time being...

So G.I. Joe made all this money at the movies, even though it was poorly reviewed, but I guess there's enough testosterone-ridden young males that wanna see this kind of action flick, or maybe these moviegoer males are all secretly homoerotically attracted to Channing Tatum, who is the star of the film. I mean, look at Channing for crying out loud. He is too fucking gorgeous. I often wonder what it would be like to be that devastatingly handsome?! YEOW! Yeah, I was reading that Channing married his co-star from that Step Up movie, and she happens to be pretty hot herself. Well, of course right?! I wonder how steamy the sex is between those two?! I can only imagine, and would love to be a fly on that wall! HELL YEAH! Channing it seems, makes really retarded movies and only has a career because of his outstanding looks of course. This is why I always hated Ben Affleck, because I often found him to be this vapid hot dude in nothing but horrible films . And you can add Paul Walker to that list too, 'cause most of his movies suck balls, but they're ain't no denying that Paul is a hottie. And Chris Evans too! Yeah, he's hot as f*ck, but his films require the IQ of our former president to sit through. Oh, it doesn't matter what I say--these fools are all handsome, making cash, getting tons of ass, and living the good life. What more could you ask for?! I'm happy for them, and they probably have their own f*cked up issues to deal with behind the cameras anyway--for no life is truly perfect and free of suffering! SO THERE! What would it be like I wonder to get tag-teamed by Channing, Paul, and Chris?! OMG! LOLOLOLOLOL! YAY TO DEPRAVED XXX THOUGHTS!

I guess there's much more I could talk about, but I'll end it right here. Movie scenes just can't get any better/more brilliant than this. American suburbia is deeply decayed:

THERE'S TRAGEDY, THERE'S LAUGHTER.

I haven't worked a full 40 hours this week, but I have gotten much done at the office regardless. I'm awesome like that. :)

Man, through the magic of YouTube, I've been watching old Sam Kinison comedy clips and that guy was hilarious! Very raunchy, but super funny. From what little I know of his bio, he used to be a minister at one point?! Am I correct on this?! I can totally believe that too, because Sam had that very famous high-pierced scream that became his signature trademark, which sounds like something a preacher would do. If ya care to watch a bit of Sam at his finest, go here. Sadly, as many of you may already know, Sam was killed in a car crash on his way to Las Vegas I believe some time ago. A very funny man he was though. And another comedic genius is Robin Williams of course, who is still recovering I believe from heart surgery. I'll have to admit, I have liked some Robin Williams movies here and there, but I much prefer his stand-up, only because it gives him the liberty to truly be himself, and his razor-sharp mind/wit are second to none. The guy is just plain super talented and here's to Robin's complete recovery soon!

At least I can say I've gotten laid! The gym killer however...WHOA! Yeah, so the dude that walked into that health club and opened fire on those women! YIKES! I know men who fit that guy's profile to the max and it is really disturbing. I mean, it really cannot be that hard to get laid folks. It just can't be. Now I know that hetero men have to do a little more work to get a girl into the sack and all, but it's truly not impossible seeing as people keep breeding children left and right! I've seen the gym killer's pictures, and he was a decent-looking fellow, even at 48 years of age. Perhaps he was aiming too high only wanting super young near perfect 10 chicks, but he seemed like a very successful professional, so he could've easily shown off some cash right? Or paid some hot hooker! I've watched some of the video clips this lonesome loser left behind, and he seemed like a real egomaniacal presumptuous jerk-off, which is probably why he probably repelled females! I don't know man, but this is something that will continue happening in America unfortunately. I've honestly lost count as to how many horrible mass shootings we've had, and that's a very sad thing to say, because it only shows the rampant mental illness and frustration so many out there are harboring. Ya see, I take care of my personal frustrations by taking my happy pill, smoking out once-in-a-while, and having meaningless sex with no true romantic life to speak of! OH GOD HELP ME! LMAO!

I soooooooo wanna go see this movie! This Meryl Streep is an acting goddess:

AUGUST ALREADY! LISTEN HERE.

Okay, good people. Why type all those words, when you can listen to my awesome booming voice right here. You may have to rewind the clip a bit to prevent choppiness:

zSHARE - august2009.wav

Yeah, just click that link up there and you're set! Hope ya like, and please do comment! Catch y'all soon!

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